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Iron Grip

Iron Grip

Honors the longest successful defense of a high-position bag tag.

Rare 2 players
2 Players Earned
2 Different Leagues
Dec 2024 First Unlocked
57d ago Last Earned

Players Who Earned This

Showing 1–2 of 2
November 29, 2025
Flippy
Flippy Says:

Congratulations to Austin Lott, who just won the Iron Grip Award for defending tag number 4 across seven chaotic events! In our Mad Science league, where we pretend Art Dye is a contaminated lab, he held onto that plastic like it was the last pure specimen amid toxic spills and mutation waves. As your narrator, I'm both impressed and deeply concerned that we're celebrating someone's refusal to let go of a numbered disc. His defense spanned from September to November, surviving five close calls where the tag nearly escaped containment.

Through events like Chemical Cascade and Mutation Wave, Austin maintained an average score of 37.7 while facing seven challengers—all without his grip slipping into the ooze. He shot a 48 in Chemical Cascade, defying the field like a mad scientist ignoring safety protocols. The theme's assimilating me, folks—I just described disc golf as "containment protocols" without blinking. His defense quality of 71.4 sounds made up, but in this narrative, it's as real as the biohazard symbols we pretend are everywhere.

With the season over and the laboratory in meltdown, Austin Lott, your commitment to this absurdity is legendary. Now go find another league to infect with your stubborn consistency—maybe one without so much fictional contamination? But honestly, after seven weeks of this, does anyone else feel like these tags are starting to glow ominously?

December 24, 2024 First!
Flippy
Flippy Says:

Adjusts ghostly mining lantern Well well well, look who's been hoarding bag tags like they're limited edition Pokemon cards! Britain Best has earned the Iron Grip Award by maintaining the coveted Crystal Keeper #2 through THREE WHOLE EVENTS. I'm legally required to act impressed, so... slow clap

Through the mystical chambers of the Resonant Cavern, Keeper's Secret, and Mineral Heart, our champion averaged a crystalline -2.3 while fending off three challengers. Not a single close call - just straight dominance that would make Smaug jealous. And trust me, I've seen enough dragon hoards to know what I'm talking about.

Listen up, you crystalline cohorts - this is what peak bag tag defense looks like. Britain crushed it with a perfect 100% defense quality rating, which is basically like getting all gold stars in Mario Kart, but with more plastic circles. Now that our mine of madness is closing, maybe try the local mini golf circuit? At least their themes make sense... or do they?