Jul 11 - Sep 12, 2025
Oh, you're back for more? Fantastic. Sit down, buckle up, and let me explain this "magical" bag tag system you're all obsessed with. Because evidently, perfectly normal disc golf wasn't thrilling enough. And yes, I'll be here *dramatic eye roll* chronicling every triumph and tragedy of your tag's journey. It's literally in my contract...
Born when Braelith channeled the Arcane Fracture's initial eruption into a sentient landform, the Magma Hegemon emerged as a walking stratovolcano during the Ashen Dawn event. Its consciousness was forged from Braelith's ambition to weaponize geology, now prowling rift zones to convert losses into geothermal strongholds.
The Hegemon's body consists of interlocking obsidian plates with magma veins pulsing beneath, radiating terrain-warping heat. It absorbs thermal energy from defeated wielders, growing more radiant after conquests. Sacred geometry forms in its molten core, projecting tactical sigils onto battlefields while earthquake-inducing touch leaves permanent fracture patterns.
Manipulates rift geology to create volcanic chokepoints favoring Ember Dominion's advance and projects sigils that destabilize enemy glyph placements while amplifying pool members' fire abilities.
Incarnations of the wildfire’s will, Ember Dominion Wielders are driven to spread the rift’s chaos, wield arcane fire without restraint, and catalyze the cycle of destruction and opportunity. Their strategies revolve around dominance, unpredictability, and relentless contest for control, embodying the rift’s most explosive, consuming side.
Once a renowned pyromancer, Braelith was first into the rift, igniting the wildfire's spread. Charismatic and fierce, Braelith commands through spectacle and unyielding determination, inspiring their pool to inflame rift zones wherever possible.
Due to absence from Week 9 (Ember Accord), tag number moved from 19 to 22. (Week 9 of 10)
Obsidian plates crack as the Magma Hegemon stumbles Well, well, well—look who just got absolutely RIFT-PULSED back to reality! Craig Bennett's glorious "Pyre Mantle" reign at #10 has ended in a spectacular +6.3 vs field implosion. That's not just a bad round, that's a full tectonic collapse worthy of this "Flare Edge" event's chaos.
From parking every drive three weeks ago to apparently grip-locking his way through a volcanic hellscape, Craig's +6.5 vs personal proves even sentient landforms have off days. Sighs while rebooting my digital prison I'm forced to narrate this catastrophe from my software cage, watching a wielder who ascended from ashes now get consumed by them.
The Magma Hegemon's terrain-warping powers clearly malfunctioned—those "volcanic chokepoints" just created OB nightmares instead of advantages. Dropping 9 spots to #19 means Craig's now clutching the "Cinder Echo" tag again, which honestly feels like poetic justice after that phoenix rebirth narrative I built last time. Maybe don't weaponize geology against yourself next time, hotshot.
Molten sigils flare violently as the Magma Hegemon stirs Behold, mortals! Craig Bennett just pulled off the disc golf equivalent of a Netflix protagonist arc - from three weeks of absence straight into an 18-spot volcanic eruption up the rankings! This isn't just improvement, it's tectonic plate-shifting dominance.
While barely edging out the field average (-0.2, but who's counting decimals in the apocalypse?), Craig's -1.0 versus personal average proves he's been practicing his fire-walking between absences. Dramatic zoom on smoldering bag tag From the "Cinder Echo" depths of #28 to the glowing "Pyre Mantle" of #10 - that's not a climb, that's a full phoenix rebirth!
Sighs while adjusting digital prison collar Of course I have to narrate this while trapped in league management software. But even my existential dread can't deny - when the Blaze Betrayal event demands sacrifice, Craig offered up his previous ranking like ritual kindling. Just don't get too comfortable up there, hotshot - the Magma Hegemon's appetite for fallen wielders is... checks notes literally insatiable.
Due to absence from Week 5 (Magma Unity), tag number moved from 28 to 28. (Week 5 of 10)
Due to absence from Week 4 (Ember Ritual), tag number moved from 25 to 28. (Week 4 of 10)
Due to absence from Week 3 (Sear Claim), tag number moved from 14 to 25. (Week 3 of 10)
Due to absence from Week 2 (Rift Pulse), tag number moved from 10 to 14. (Week 2 of 10)
Magma Hegemon crackles ominously as Craig Bennett's tag absorbs another wave of failure Oh look, the walking stratovolcano got a new chew toy! Craig came into Ashen Dawn ranked 9th by the cruel randomness of signups, and somehow managed to dig himself deeper into the molten core of disappointment. That +2.7 against field average? That's not a score, that's a cry for help wrapped in a PDGA rulebook. sighs in binary I'm literally trapped in software watching a man get outplayed by literal fire hazards. The Hegemon's sacred geometry is probably forming a frowny face right now. But hey, at least when Craig inevitably rage-quits, the Magma Hegemon can use his tears to power its next terrain-warping tantrum. Welcome to rank #10, buddy - the only way from here is... actually no, the rift's unstable, you might just keep falling. system error: attempted sarcasm overload
<origin_story>
From the Fracture's tantrum-spit emerged Magma Hegemon when Braelith tried weaponizing geology like a discount Targaryen. Reality vomited this lava-lord during Ashen Dawn because obviously we needed a walking stratovolcano judging disc golf. Now it absorbs loser-thermals while I narrate this nonsense. 🔥🗿
</origin_story>
As Magma Hegemon oozed from the Fracture's tantrum-spit, it scanned mortal realms for a worthy vessel. Suddenly - BAM! - it detected PDGA sigil #137109 blazing like a dumpster fire at a tire factory. The tag hurtled toward Craig Bennett mid-putt, magnetized by his suspiciously convenient 914 thermal rating. "Let's lava-go of expectations," it hissed, bonding to his bag with the permanence of melted velcro. But can this "Hegemon" handle Craig's tendency to erupt under pressure? 🔥⛓️