Thunderbird Interceptor
Oh, you're back for more? Fantastic. Sit down, buckle up, and let me explain this "magical" bag tag system you're all obsessed with. Because evidently, perfectly normal disc golf wasn't thrilling enough. And yes, I'll be here *dramatic eye roll* chronicling every triumph and tragedy of your tag's journey. It's literally in my contract...
Born from an ancient ritual combining the essence of the legendary Thunderbird with forbidden shadow magic, creating a being bound to serve the Sentinels' cause and prevent the Phoenix's rebirth.
Can summon and control massive storms, phase through solid objects, become nearly invisible in darkness, generate hurricane-force winds with its wings, and project beams of concentrated electricity from its eyes.
Serves as the Obsidian Sentinels' primary aerial enforcer and mobile early warning system, disrupting Pilgrim movements and obscuring the path of the Phoenix's ashes.
The Obsidian Sentinels are a mysterious group that opposes the Phoenix's rebirth, believing that the current order must be maintained at all costs. They work to prevent the Ashen Pilgrims from completing their journey, setting up obstacles and challenges along the way. The Sentinels are characterized by their secrecy, cunning, and relentless pursuit of their goals.
Zephyr Shadowcloak is an enigmatic figure who leads the Obsidian Sentinels from the shadows. Little is known about their past, but they are driven by a fierce belief that the Phoenix's rebirth would bring chaos and destruction to the world. Zephyr orchestrates the Sentinels' efforts to thwart the Ashen Pilgrims, always staying one step ahead of their opponents.
In Week 8 (Phoenix's Pinnacle), the player improved their position with tag number changing from 14 to 5. (Week 8 of 8)
Due to absence from Week 7 (Sacrificial Sparks), tag number moved from 14 to 14. (Week 7 of 8)
Due to absence from Week 6 (Blaze's Breakthrough), tag number moved from 11 to 14. (Week 6 of 8)
Due to absence from Week 5 (Pyre's Purification), tag number moved from 13 to 11. (Week 5 of 8)
You missed this event! Come back next week to move back into contention.
Sighs dramatically Welcome to "Ashes Ascending," where I'm forced to narrate plastic-throwers following mythical bird dandruff. Stephen Marks somehow snatched Fledgling's Flame #9 despite throwing like his discs were made of actual phoenix feathers—pretty but ineffective. His storm-summoning powers clearly didn't help control those flights! He climbed ONE WHOLE POSITION, folks! slow clap Such majesty! Such power! Such... mediocrity! His shadow magic origin story is more impressive than this performance. I'm trapped in this software longer than a Phoenix's rebirth cycle, watching him rise from the ashes like a discount Fawkes. Will his hurricane-force winds blow better next time, or continue pushing his own discs into trees?
Forged in the fires of Mount Doom (budget version), the Thunderbird Interceptor burst forth, a shadowy servant born to harsh the Phoenix's rebirth vibe. Powered by forbidden magic and a serious grudge, this tag's ready to throw down and keep the status quo. Will our plucky hero prevail, or will the Sentinels' enforcer rain on their rebirth parade? Stay tuned, disc golf fans!
Sigh And now, the origin of our first Thunderbird Interceptor victim—I mean "chosen one."
Stephen Marks, PDGA #257564, was minding his business when the tag manifested in a puff of budget smoke effects. His modest 780 rating? Actually an ancient numeric code predicting this very moment! The tag sensed his masculine disc-flinging potential and latched onto his bag like a clingy ex.
Will this unsuspecting dude rise to intercept glory, or will he crash and burn like my hopes of escaping this narrative prison? Stay tuned!