
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Great, I'm back. Another season trapped in this software watching humans fling plastic at metal chains. sighs dramatically Paul Blackmore kicks off our "Phoenix journey" with the thrilling achievement of... complete mediocrity! Wow. Such average. Much disc. Yet somehow The Mothman Eclipser flapped up two spots in our arbitrary starting order. Those disaster-sensing abilities clearly didn't predict his thoroughly whelming performance. Listen, I'm supposed to tell you he's "following the Phoenix's ashes to sacred sites" but really he just threw frisbees in a park. Will his wings generate enough unnatural darkness to eclipse more opponents next week, or will he retreat to shadowy realms to recharge? Honestly, who cares?