Jared Lang: #8 Glacial Oracle

Jared Lang

Jared Lang

PDGA Rating 957
Division MPO
Events Played 6
8
Jared Lang
Pool Emblem Glacial Oracle
Background

Ascent of the Abominable @ The Fort

Whiteout Guardians Emblem
Mar 04 - Apr 22, 2025
Averaged a 946 rating
#8 Glacial Oracle
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So, You Want to Know About These Tags?
Flippy
*aggressively taps microphone while glaring at camera*

Oh, you're back for more? Fantastic. Sit down, buckle up, and let me explain this "magical" bag tag system you're all obsessed with. Because evidently, perfectly normal disc golf wasn't thrilling enough. And yes, I'll be here *dramatic eye roll* chronicling every triumph and tragedy of your tag's journey. It's literally in my contract...

  1. 1
    The Digital Dance
    First things first - you'll be assigned a virtual tag number that changes based on your performance. Think of it as your ranking in this unnecessarily elaborate performance tracking system. *mutters under breath* As if regular scoring wasn't complicated enough...
  2. 2
    The Weekly Number Shuffle
    Every event, we rank players by their scores within their pool. Shoot the lowest score? Congratulations, your tag number becomes #1. *sarcastically waves tiny flag* Shoot the highest? Well... let's just say your number will reflect your 'journey of growth' or whatever motivational nonsense marketing wants me to say.
  3. 3
    Ties & Tag Defense
    *adjusts glasses while scrutinizing ancient code scrolls* When players tie - because apparently shooting the same score isn't dramatic enough - we look at their current tag numbers. The player with the lower number wins the tie. So if #4 and #8 tie, #4 stays ahead. Yes, the rich get richer. No, I don't make these rules. I just have to narrate them with increasingly dramatic flair... *stares directly into camera*
  4. 4
    Missed Events
    Skip an event? Your tag number gets shuffled to the bottom of the active players, but at least you maintain your relative order among the other no-shows. *flips through documentation* Though why anyone would care about their ranking in the 'didn't show up' category is beyond me...
  5. 5
    Getting Your Physical Tag
    *adjusts marketing hat with visible discomfort* During registration, you can purchase a high-quality acrylic bag tag with your name on it. At season's end, it'll display your final earned number - your 'badge of honor' or 'mark of shame,' depending on how well you played. They'll deliver it to your local disc golf shop. *straightens marketing materials* Just... just buy one, okay? I have quotas to meet.
  6. 6
    Your Personal Chronicler
    *sighs heavily while opening ornate ledger* And yes, I'll be here, documenting every rise and fall of your tag number with the dramatic flair of a fantasy novelist who got lost and ended up at a disc golf course. Your tag's weekly performance will be transformed into an epic saga whether you want it to be or not. It's... it's just what we do now. *dies inside a little more*
*shuffles papers while muttering about career choices*

There you have it, mortals. Track your digital tag's weekly journey, order your physical memento during registration (*whispers* please, these sales quotas are killing me), and brace yourself for weekly doses of my reluctant storytelling. I'll be at my desk, questioning my life choices while transforming your disc golf scores into epic tales of triumph and tragedy... because somehow that's become my job description.

Glacial Oracle

#8

Origin Story

The Glacial Oracle is said to have emerged from the heart of the Himalayas, born from the ancient ice that has witnessed the passage of countless ages. It is believed to be a manifestation of the mountain's collective wisdom, a guardian spirit that has guided and protected the Yeti and its secrets for millennia. The Oracle's origins are shrouded in mystery, with tales of its first appearance tied to the earliest human expeditions into the frozen peaks.

Properties

The Glacial Oracle possesses an ethereal form, composed of shimmering ice and snow that seems to shift and flow like water. It has the ability to manipulate the mountain's weather, summoning blizzards and creating ice formations to protect the Yeti's sanctuary. The Oracle can communicate through visions and dreams, imparting cryptic messages to those it deems worthy. Its presence is often accompanied by an eerie, otherworldly calm, as if time itself slows in its vicinity.

Role

The Glacial Oracle serves as the spiritual anchor for the Whiteout Guardians, maintaining the ancient barriers between the mortal realm and the Yeti's domain. It guides the faction in their mission to protect the Yeti and preserve the mountain's sacred balance, using its mystical powers to obscure the creature's trails and mislead those who would disturb the natural order.

Tag Details

League Ascent of the Abominable @ The Fort
Pool Whiteout Guardians
Whiteout Guardians faction symbol

Whiteout Guardians

The Whiteout Guardians are a group of wise, enigmatic individuals who have dedicated themselves to protecting the Yeti and the ancient wisdom it embodies. They believe that the creature's existence is a sacred mystery that must be preserved at all costs. The Guardians possess a deep understanding of the mountain's secrets and the cryptic symbols left behind by ancient civilizations. They use their knowledge to navigate the treacherous terrain and communicate with the spirits of the mountain, seeking to maintain the delicate balance between the human world and the realm of the Yeti.

Faction Leader

Tenzin Norgay

Tenzin Norgay is a respected Himalayan guide and spiritual leader who has spent his life studying the mountain's secrets and the legend of the Yeti. He formed the Whiteout Guardians to ensure that the balance between humans and the sacred creature is maintained. Norgay's deep wisdom and connection to the mountain make him the perfect leader for this enigmatic group.

Members

32

Divisions

MPO FPO MP40 MA1 MA40 MA2 MP50 MP60

Tag History

Jared Lang
Jared Lang
Week 1 Score: 63 Place: 6
4 days ago
Origin Story