
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Yo, get this - the Temporal Basilisk hatched when some mad scientist tried to make a flux capacitor out of a pocket watch and a statue. Classic Frankenstein move, amirite? Now this freaky lizard-clock is just vibing across time and space like it's no big deal. Because apparently that's just how we roll in TVille. 🙄 #TimeTravelProblems
Adjusts monocle while checking steam-powered teleprompter
And lo, the Temporal Basilisk chose Casey Howard (PDGA #96768) as its first bearer - apparently time-traveling lizard-clocks have a thing for players who can throw with clockwork precision. The Basilisk was quoted as saying "This one's timing is impeccable."
But will our chronologically-challenged champion keep control of time itself? Or will they become... history?
checks notes
I can't believe I have to narrate this stuff.