Forest Revelation

The Binder Just Got Heavier 📁

adjusts headset, flips through a binder that's gained twenty pages since last week Welcome back to Week 6 of The Loft Boys, where fifteen players braved near-freezing conditions at Urban Forest on January 5th to deliver statistical anomalies that would make the PDGA's rating algorithm file a formal complaint. The "Forest Revelation" episode promised the newcomer would discover the secret lair and witness discs floating mid-air, chains spinning eternally—and folks, the scorecards just provided the receipts. Five players shot 33+ points above rating while two others crashed so hard their discs forgot how to fly. The Spotter Brothers' conspiracy binder isn't just growing—it's metastasizing. 📊

The Concierge Called in Sick 🤒

Tyler Romney dominated RAD with a wire-to-wire -8 (940 rated, +29 above his 911 baseline), posting a bogey-free card that included a 4-hole hot streak from holes 8-11 and a Birdie Bonanza achievement. Clean front nine, clean back nine, zero drama—just surgical execution. Chris Fox held steady at -6 (912 rated) with his own clean back nine to secure 2nd, consistent with his Week 5 performance. But the real story? Kieran Buhler, holder of the #1 Nightlight Concierge bag tag, crashed from last week's dominant -8 to a catastrophic +5 (755 rated)—a 197-point rating drop and 13-stroke swing that suggests the supernatural hospitality role demands more energy than a human body can sustainably provide. The Head Floater position apparently comes with a price, and Kieran just paid it in full. 🔋

The Clutch Putt Duplication Glitch 🔄

Ryan Foose and John Ashworth tied at -8 (940 rated) in RPA, both clutch-finishing with birdies on hole 18 like the course's finale had been programmed to accept exactly two winners. Ryan led through holes 1, 10, and 14 with a 4-hole hot streak (7-10) and a clean back nine. John matched with a clean front nine, 3-hole streaks on 2-4 and 7-9, plus his own clean back nine. Both elevated their games—though Ryan's 960 rating meant his 940-rated round was actually 20 points below baseline (tough night when you're that good). Brandon Reesor (-5, 3rd) and Tongia Vakaafi (-3, 4th) rounded out the field, with Tongia's early lead through hole 2 evaporating into a 95-point rating drop from his 964 baseline. When two players birdie the final hole simultaneously to tie at -8, you're either witnessing elite competition or the supernatural matrix experiencing a duplication error. I'm contractually obligated not to speculate which. 🎯

Hole 17 Chose Violence Today 🗡️

Jon Atwater (-7, 926 rated) claimed RAE with a clutch birdie on hole 18, set up by the sole birdie on hole 17—the hole that decided everything. He made a mid-round move, climbing to 3rd after hole 7, then seized the lead from Russell Watters after hole 17 when Russell took a crucial bogey. Russell (-5, 898 rated, tied 2nd) had led through hole 12, but that hole 17 bogey cost him the outright win—the course literally picked its champion on the penultimate hole. Corry Johnson (-5, 898 rated, tied 2nd) ran a bogey-free card with clean front and back nines, shooting 52 points above his 846 rating. Dusty Ratcliffe (-2, 855 rated, 4th) set a personal best for the course, bouncing back from a double on hole 6 with a birdie on 7, and shot 57 points above rating—the day's biggest overperformance. Michael Rivera (+1, 5th) led through hole 5 but faded. Five lead changes in one division means nobody was safe, and hole 17 made sure everyone knew it. 🏆

The Glow Discs Haven't Found These Bags Yet

Carter Hale (+1, 812 rated) won RAG wire-to-wire with a personal best for the course, riding a 6-hole par train from holes 10-15 that proved consistency beats chaos when the field's still learning the layout. Trevor Taylor (+4, 769 rated) and Matt Geary (+5, 755 rated) both made their series debuts—Trevor's 921 rating meant his 769-rated round was a 152-point underperformance, the day's biggest crash alongside Kieran's collapse. Matt's first-ever league event produced a respectable +5 against a field averaging -2.7. While the "infected" divisions posted supernatural numbers, RAG's newcomers shot over par like gravity still applied to their discs. The prototype glow discs haven't reached everyone yet, but based on what happened to Kieran this week, maybe that's a blessing. 🌙

Statistical Anomalies the PDGA Can't Explain

Five players shot 33+ points above rating: Dusty Ratcliffe (+57), Corry Johnson (+52), Jon Atwater (+40), Russell Watters (+33), Tyler Romney (+29). Two players crashed hard: Kieran Buhler (-120 from rating), Trevor Taylor (-152 from rating). Two bogey-free cards were posted (Tyler Romney, Corry Johnson), while clean back nines were achieved by Chris Fox, Tyler Romney, Corry Johnson, Jon Atwater, and Ryan Foose. Clean front nines: Tyler Romney, Corry Johnson, Russell Watters, Tongia Vakaafi, Brandon Reesor, John Ashworth. Tyler Romney's Birdie Bonanza (3 consecutive birdies, holes 8-10) was the day's only multi-birdie streak achievement. Sole birdies were claimed on holes 1 (Ryan Foose), 2 (Michael Rivera), 6 (Tyler Romney), 7 (Dusty Ratcliffe), and 17 (Jon Atwater, Tongia Vakaafi). The variance between exceptional performances and catastrophic failures suggests either the course played wildly inconsistent or something else is influencing these outcomes. The PDGA's rating system accounts for course difficulty, weather, and player skill—it doesn't account for whatever's happening at Urban Forest on Monday nights. 📈

The Concierge's Lantern Flickered 🕯️

Kieran Buhler retains the #1 Nightlight Concierge tag despite his catastrophic 197-point rating drop—he failed to defend, but nobody took it from him, which means the supernatural hospitality role is still his burden to carry. The tag's lore describes a spectral attendant who greets newcomers with an unsettling yet welcoming grin, carrying "a small, eternally flickering lantern that casts no heat." That lantern apparently flickered out on hole 2 where Kieran took a double bogey. His recovery birdie on hole 3 showed the tag's influence hadn't completely faded, but the 5-hole par train from holes 4-8 felt more like survival than dominance. The Nightlight Concierge "emits a soft, moth-like glow that pulses gently, casting long, dramatic shadows that seem to point the way"—but this week, those shadows pointed straight down instead of toward the basket. Kieran's Week 5 ascension from #3 to #1 made him the "Head Floater" in practice, and Week 6 revealed the cost: the supernatural hospitality vampire who greets newcomers while their discs hover in defiance of physics apparently needs to recharge between ceremonies. The tag's latest history notes that "each rung he climbs, the Nightlight Concierge tightens its grip"—and now we know what that grip feels like when it squeezes too hard. 👻

Hole 10 Collected Bogeys, Not Aces

No CTP, Ace, or Super Ace winners this week, but hole 10—the Super Ace hole—defended itself with extreme prejudice. Kieran Buhler, Matt Geary, Trevor Taylor, Tongia Vakaafi, and John Ashworth all took bogeys there, a casualty rate that suggests the hole has opinions about who gets paid. The pot carries over, growing more dangerous, and the supernatural apparently protects its secrets by extracting tribute from anyone who gets too close. Five named players bogied the hole that's supposed to yield aces—the math doesn't add up unless you accept that Urban Forest's baskets have agency. ⛓️

$58.50 Changed Hands in the Fog 💸

Two skins cards saw nine players exchange $58.50 in the kind of side-game drama that makes the main event look tame. On the 2:20 PM card, Brandon Reesor scooped a 10-skin carryover on hole 12 for $20.00—the day's biggest haul—while Chris Fox took 4 skins ($8.00) off 7 birdies, and Tongia Vakaafi opened and closed the card with birdies on holes 2 and 17. The 3:40 PM card saw John Ashworth lead with 8 skins ($10.00) off 9 birdies, including a 5-skin scoop on hole 7 after a 4-hole push. Tyler Romney grabbed 6 skins, Jon Atwater closed with 3 on hole 17, and Russell Watters snagged 1 on hole 14. Carryovers are just delayed gratification, and Brandon's patience paid dividends. Any card can enable skins—Learn how to set up skins. 🎲

$363.85 Toward Something That Won't Hover Away

Episode 6 "Forest Revelation" promised the newcomer would discover the secret lair and witness the truth—discs floating, chains spinning eternally, the Head Floater presiding over it all. This week delivered: multiple players shot 40-57 points above rating while others crashed catastrophically, and the evidence is no longer in the Spotter Brothers' binder—it's in the scorecards. Meanwhile, $17.50 was raised for the Urban Forest Course Fund ($15.00 automatic from the $1/player entry, $2.50 in additional contributions across 18 total donations), bringing the fund to $363.85 of its $1,000 goal (36%). Ryan Foose and Dusty Ratcliffe earned Charitable Champion achievements for donating 10% of their winnings—proof that even in a supernatural league, some players invest in improvements that won't vanish at sunrise. Urban Forest's dirt fairways, rocky terrain, and thick underbrush could use better tee signage, mud mitigation on hole 1, and maybe some benches for those 6-hole par trains. Course improvements are permanent, unlike the supernatural hang time that apparently has an expiration date. 🌲

Four Weeks Until Sunrise, No Pressure ☀️

Week 6 of 10 complete, and the revelation is done—the newcomer has seen the lair, witnessed the truth, and now faces the choice Episode 6 promised: embrace the power or leave and forget everything. But the data suggests some players (Kieran, Trevor) are already paying the price of the supernatural, while others (Tyler, Jon, Corry) are riding the wave without apparent consequence. Week 7 brings "Midnight Chains"—a confrontation in the fog where answers are demanded and the Loft Boys' leader will break character to reveal the only way out: break the source before sunrise at the cliffside pin. The path to the sunrise showdown narrows with each passing Monday. And somewhere in that maintenance shed turned neon-lit sanctuary, the saxophone player is warming up for a solo that still makes absolutely no sense. The conspiracy isn't just validated—it's documented, funded, and four weeks away from its reckoning. See you in the fog. 🎷