Crimson Glide @ Art Dye
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Event Details
About This League
Final week! Crimson Glide's faction war concludes at Art Dye this Sunday (Apr 12). Flex starts 4:40-5:40 PM, shotgun 6 PM. $50 ace pot guaranteed by ElevateUT Disc Golf. The simulation needs challengers! ⚓️🎬
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
The Crimson Current simulation reaches its terminal week. The Grid and The Surge prepare for final confrontation at Art Dye. The arena is disturbingly empty. The rating will be published regardless.
Tactical Absurdity, Final Chapter
*rewind sound* Welcome to the finale of Crimson Glide, a slapstick parody of 'Crimson Tide' (1995) trapped inside The Chaintrix—a 90s movie simulation framework that has assimilated my aquatic code into VHS static. For nine weeks, two factions have LARPed naval strategy with disc golf throws. The Grid enforces algorithmic discipline. The Surge weaponizes chaotic misreads. The storm-lashed coastal command arena is actually Art Dye Park in Utah. The simulation resets after this.
Simulation Crisis: Low Participation
Faction Warfare: Choose Your Dysfunction
The simulation divides challengers into two rival pools, because conflict drives narrative.
- THE GRID: FPO, RPA, RAH, RAD divisions. Algorithmic discipline. Every throw is a calculated vector. Emotional variance is filtered out. They probably have spreadsheets for their putts.
- THE SURGE: FA2, RAE, RAF, RAG divisions. Chaotic improvisation. Turns weather-worn misreads into performance art. They definitely laugh at their own tree hits.
The winner isn't the faction with the best score—it's the one whose philosophy survives the simulation's final recalibration. Probably.
Final Frame: Event Intel
Choose your own card time during the flex window, or join the unified shotgun start for maximum dramatic tension. This is it. No more events after this. The simulation locks all tag challenges.
Financial Tributes & Guarantees
The current ace pot is $50. Here's the critical intel: ElevateUT Disc Golf (the league platform) guarantees a minimum $50 ace pot. If contributions don't exceed $50, the pot looks 'stuck' at $50. If an ace is hit and the pot is below $50, ElevateUT tops it up to $50, with the top-up credited to the winner's Bonus Account (registration-only funds). This guarantee is from the platform, not the disc shop. Now go ace a hole.
Current Simulation Rankings
The arena has been tracking composure indices. In RAD, Craig Bennett commands with 894 points from 49 events—a staggering volume of simulated combat. In RPA, Brian Hansen leads with 809 points. These are the challengers with the highest 'unbroken composure' metrics. The final rating will be based on cold performance data, not charisma. The simulation is watching.
Real World vs. Simulation
While we play at tactical absurdity, our facilitating club, ElevateUT Disc Golf, is a 501(c)(3) non-profit actually growing the sport by building permanent courses. The contrast is delicious. Support them. Also, thanks to our local retail partner, Another Round Salt Lake City, for keeping challengers equipped with actual discs, not simulated ones.
Mandatory Parody Intel
Final Transmission
This is the last event. The simulation resets after 'Final Frame.' If you've been waiting for the perfect moment to join a 90s naval parody disc golf league... congratulations, you have exactly one week left. The arena needs challengers. The Grid needs opposition. The Surge needs an audience. My VHS tape needs something interesting to record. Show up. Throw. Let the current decide.
*The simulation doesn't negotiate, but I'll complain about its narrative choices on your behalf.*
Weather forecast will be available 2 days before the event
Art Dye
Slingers @ Art Dye
ElevateUT: Crimson Glide @ Art Dye (Flex Start)
Course Rules
Art Dye Disc Golf Park - Slingers @ Art Dye
General Notes
All fence lines play as OB. Do not hop fences into backyards!
Layout Details
| Hole | Tee | Par | Feet | Notes |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | 3 | 212 | ||
| 2 | 3 | 364 | Fence and beyond on right side OB. | |
| 3 | 3 | 283 | ||
| 4 | 3 | 201 | ||
| 5 | 3 | 395 | Fence and beyond on left side OB. | |
| 6 | Long | 4 | 573 | 2 Mando trees in play on the right. Must pass to the left of each tree. |
| 7 | 3 | 343 | Mando Left of tree in fairway. | |
| 8 | 3 | 316 | Road and right play as hazard | |
| 9 | 3 | 227 | Double Mando in play | |
| 10 | 3 | 312 | ||
| 11 | 3 | 277 | ||
| 12 | 3 | 210 | ||
| 13 | Long | 3 | 326 | Fence and beyond on right side OB. |
| 14 | 3 | 299 | Fence and beyond on right side OB. | |
| 15 | 3 | 200 | ||
| 16 | 3 | 259 | Walking path and beyond OB | |
| 17 | 3 | 204 | Walking path and beyond OB | |
| 18 | 3 | 315 | Walking path and beyond OB |
See how this league handles pro and amateur payouts.
Schedule
Week 1: Grid Lock
Course: Art Dye
Week 2: Surge Tide
Course: Art Dye
Week 3: Current Shift
Course: Art Dye
Week 4: Coach Fade
Course: Art Dye
Week 5: VHS Glitch
Course: Art Dye
Week 6: Crimson Drift
Course: Art Dye
Week 7: Code Rain
Course: Art Dye
Week 8: Facet Break
Course: Art Dye
Week 9: Final Frame
Course: Art Dye
League
Organization & Directors
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Course Fund
Course Improvement Fund
A portion of your registration fee goes towards the course improvement fund or yearly project.
