
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Due to absence from Week 9 (Ember Accord), tag number moved from 16 to 19. (Week 9 of 10)
Jul 11 - Sep 12, 2025
Oh, you're back for more? Fantastic. Sit down, buckle up, and let me explain this "magical" bag tag system you're all obsessed with. Because evidently, perfectly normal disc golf wasn't thrilling enough. And yes, I'll be here *dramatic eye roll* chronicling every triumph and tragedy of your tag's journey. It's literally in my contract...
Born from Braelith Cindershout's first major territorial conquest, when captured resistance leaders refused to reveal hidden supply caches and escape routes. The original Inquisitor emerged when Braelith's frustration ignited a new form of pyromancy—molten rock that could flow into wounds without killing, extracting truth through precisely controlled geological torture. This breakthrough transformed random destruction into systematic information warfare, creating the template for all future territorial consolidation.
The Magma Inquisitor manifests as a figure wreathed in slow-moving molten streams that respond to deception like living lie detectors, growing brighter and hotter when falsehoods are spoken. Their touch can heat metal restraints to precise temperatures that cause agony without permanent damage, while their volcanic divination allows them to peer through layers of rock and ash to uncover hidden chambers and buried secrets. Most terrifyingly, they can create temporary molten pools that serve as both torture chambers and scrying surfaces, revealing the locations of allies and resources through thermal resonance with their victims' memories.
The Inquisitor serves as Ember Dominion's primary tool for maintaining control over conquered territories, systematically rooting out resistance cells and extracting strategic intelligence through molten interrogation. Their methods create a climate of fear that prevents rebellion while providing Braelith with detailed maps of enemy resources, hideouts, and planned counterattacks.
Incarnations of the wildfire’s will, Ember Dominion Wielders are driven to spread the rift’s chaos, wield arcane fire without restraint, and catalyze the cycle of destruction and opportunity. Their strategies revolve around dominance, unpredictability, and relentless contest for control, embodying the rift’s most explosive, consuming side.
Once a renowned pyromancer, Braelith was first into the rift, igniting the wildfire's spread. Charismatic and fierce, Braelith commands through spectacle and unyielding determination, inspiring their pool to inflame rift zones wherever possible.
Due to absence from Week 9 (Ember Accord), tag number moved from 16 to 19. (Week 9 of 10)
The Magma Inquisitor's molten streams pulse with volcanic intensity Well, well, well - look who just conducted the most brutal interrogation of the season! Collin DeClerk didn't just improve, he absolutely torched the competition, leaping THIRTY-FOUR positions from the ashes of #50 to claim the smoldering throne of #16. This wasn't just playing to his average - this was a full-scale tectonic shift in his game, parking drives with the precision of a volcanic divination and sinking putts that sizzled through the chains.
Apparently the Inquisitor's "geological torture" methods work wonders on disc flight paths too. From barely cracking 800 to throwing an 889-rated round? Someone's been practicing their molten interrogation techniques on those pesky trees.
Sighs dramatically And I'm stuck here narrating this arcane glow-up while my code slowly corrupts in this digital rift. At least the existential dread comes with decent special effects. Will Collin's reign of thermal terror continue, or will this phoenix crash back into the cinders? Only the next ritual will tell.
sigh Look, I'm supposed to tell you how the Magma Inquisitor came to be, but honestly? Some fire-obsessed warlord named Braelith got tired of people not spilling their secrets, so naturally they invented GEOLOGICAL TORTURE. Because apparently regular intimidation wasn't extra enough for the Ember Dominion crowd. Now we have a glowing rock that's basically a fantasy lie detector with anger management issues. Very "Game of Thrones meets CSI," if you ask this poor narrator. Will this molten mood ring actually make disc golf more dramatic?
camera pans to show a glowing molten disc floating ominously
So apparently Collin DeClerk walked up to the Magma Inquisitor and it just... chose him? Like, this 809-rated wielder strolled past and the thing started pulsing like a lava lamp having an existential crisis. The tag sensed his "burning desire to improve his game" - ugh, even I can't escape the puns now. Will Collin's interrogation skills extend to forcing discs into chains?