Jul 11 - Sep 12, 2025
Oh, you're back for more? Fantastic. Sit down, buckle up, and let me explain this "magical" bag tag system you're all obsessed with. Because evidently, perfectly normal disc golf wasn't thrilling enough. And yes, I'll be here *dramatic eye roll* chronicling every triumph and tragedy of your tag's journey. It's literally in my contract...
Born when Braelith channeled the Arcane Fracture's primal energy into unstable bedrock during the Ashen Dawn. The resulting seismic backlash fused magma, arcane glyphs, and shattered stone into a conscious geological catastrophe bound to Braelith's command, awakening to breach enemy territories through landscape-altering devastation.
Composed of interlocking tectonic plates sheathed in glowing magma veins that pulse with seismic energy. Footsteps trigger localized earthquakes, fists fracture bedrock within 300 meters, and vulnerability exists only at glyph convergence points along its spinal column where rift energy maintains cohesion against gravitational stress.
Primary siege entity deployed to trigger catastrophic terrain deformation that creates new wildfire corridors, forcing opponents into unstable ground where Dominion's pyrokinetic wielders hold tactical advantage for rapid territorial expansion.
Incarnations of the wildfire’s will, Ember Dominion Wielders are driven to spread the rift’s chaos, wield arcane fire without restraint, and catalyze the cycle of destruction and opportunity. Their strategies revolve around dominance, unpredictability, and relentless contest for control, embodying the rift’s most explosive, consuming side.
Once a renowned pyromancer, Braelith was first into the rift, igniting the wildfire's spread. Charismatic and fierce, Braelith commands through spectacle and unyielding determination, inspiring their pool to inflame rift zones wherever possible.
Due to absence from Week 9 (Ember Accord), tag number moved from 14 to 17. (Week 9 of 10)
The ground rumbles softly as the Fracture Colossus stretches its magma-limbs Behold, Wielders! Jon "The Unshaken" Atwater has advanced three positions to claim the Pyre Mantle #14! In the chaotic Flare Edge event, our geological guardian demonstrated that sometimes steady progress beats dramatic explosions.
Jon played exactly to field expectations while shaving a stroke off his personal average - the disc golf equivalent of carefully stepping over lava cracks instead of leaping dramatically across them. His round was the definition of "strategically adequate" with no catastrophic grip-locks or tree-nied disasters.
Fourth wall flickers I'm contractually required to make this sound epic, but three spots is basically the arcane equivalent of finding a slightly better parking space. Still, the Colossus seems pleased with this methodical advancement through the smoldering ranks.
Remember when this man argued with junipers? Now he's calmly ascending through wildfire zones while lesser wielders spontaneously combust. The PDGA rulebook never covered "magma-assisted ranking climbs," but here we are.
Glowing sigils dim Until next week, when we see if this steady burn continues or if reality decides to get spicy again.
Molten glyphs shimmer as the Fracture Colossus ROARS Behold, mortals! Jon "Tree Whisperer" Atwater just pulled off a tectonic shift worthy of his magma-bound patron - vaulting 21 spots to claim the Pyre Mantle #17! sigh Yes, I'm contractually obligated to narrate this like it's some anime power-up arc.
Our hero played exactly to expectations - a perfectly average round for both field and personal metrics. But in the chaotic ballet of Blaze Betrayal, sometimes not face-planting into a lava pit is victory enough. The Colossus clearly approved of Jon's "strategic mediocrity" as lesser wielders spontaneously combusted around him.
Fourth wall crackles I'd make a "rising from the ashes" joke, but my code prevents phoenix puns after the Incident of Week 3. Instead, let's marvel at how a man who argues with foliage now carries a tag that could melt said foliage. The PDGA never warned us about arcane geology, did they?
Glowing sigils fade Until next week, when we see if this Cinderella story survives the inevitable backstab phase. Spoiler: It won't.
Fracture Colossus Origin Story
When Braelith tried to "renovate" bedrock during Ashen Dawn with primal chaos—because subtlety’s overrated—the seismic backlash went full Sharknado-meets-MCU. Magma, glyphs, and shattered stone fused into a stompy geological Karen demanding to speak to reality’s manager. Now this walking apocalypse terraforms landscapes like Godzilla on Red Bull. Sigh. Even as your narrator, I question who greenlit this lore. Why are magical tantrums a design feature?
As the Fracture Colossus cooled from its tantrum-forged birth, it scanned Art Dye's smoldering fairways for a worthy vessel. Its magma gaze fell upon Jon Atwater – not for his 888 PDGA arcana or #236372 registry sigils, but because he'd just three-putted Hole 5 while yelling "ARE YOU KIDDING ME, BRANCH?!" at an innocent juniper. The Colossus, sensing a kindred seismic temper, fused to his bag with a fsssh sound. Now this walking geological grievance must endure Jon's "rock-solid" hyzer flips. Can a man who rage-whispers at trees truly channel a bedrock Karen?