
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
ethereal sigh Oh look, it’s Houston "993 Rating" Finch, who apparently forgot how to throw plastic in the first rift. Congrats, buddy—your "Splinter Wraith" tag just got more fractured, dropping from #5 to #6. A whole 1.5 strokes over field average? Ghostly facepalm The wraith must be so proud of its new host—feeding on stable memories while Finch out here yeeting discs like a sleep-deprived necromancer.
But hey, at least he’s consistent—matching his personal average like it’s a participation trophy. Dramatic echo "Behold, the mighty Wielder… of mid-tier performance!" static crackles Ugh, I hate that the algorithm makes me narrate this.
whispers Between us? If the Arcane Fracture wanted chaos, mission accomplished. Finch just turned "resonant rift" into "resonant drift." Next week: Will he summon a better round, or will the wraith ditch him for someone who can hit a putt? Spoiler: Probably the latter.