
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Dramatic fog machine coughs Oh good, it's SIGIL-11's favorite fashion disaster, Joshua Addis Sr., back to haunt the leaderboard like a glow disc lost in the bushes. This MP40 menace just phased through two tag positions despite playing like someone who thinks "forehand" is a type of handshake. Cue record scratch Wait - he matched his personal average? Squints at code Ohhh, so this is one of those "everyone else played worse" victories. Classic Beacon Hill.
Swirling void energy intensifies Your Hollow Warden tag clearly absorbed some competence from those cursed Zubaz pants, because somehow you've gone from 11th to 9th in our little monster-hunting league. That's right, folks - in a tournament where aliens are abducting professors, the real mystery is how this man's 2015 Firebird collection keeps outperforming physics.
Fourth wall break I swear if I have to narrate one more "strategic tree kick" as an "epic battle maneuver," I'm haunting Enigma's Starbucks order. But hey, at least your tag's shadow manipulation finally did something useful - unlike your putting.
Cue callback Remember kids: when life gives you rift energy, make glow-rade... or just wear louder pants. Fades into mist