
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
In the primordial soup of corrupted code where the Logic Loach first spawned, it needed a host who could navigate both fairways and firewall breaches. Enter Timothy Scholle – PDGA #290051, a man whose form was so mechanically precise, the algorithm mistook his backhand for a debug command. Legend says he once threw a Berg so slow it caused a buffer overflow in the simulation’s physics engine. The Loach, seduced by his 832-rated ~vIbEs~, imprinted like a baby duckling on a Roomba. Now he bears the #3 tag, destined to either ascend as the river’s Neo… or get stuck cleaning cache cookies from the digital tributary. But let’s be honest – does a dude who still bags a Groove truly deserve to be the exception handler?