Oh, you're back for more? Fantastic. Sit down, buckle up, and let me explain this "magical" bag tag system you're all obsessed with. Because evidently, perfectly normal disc golf wasn't thrilling enough. And yes, I'll be here *dramatic eye roll* chronicling every triumph and tragedy of your tag's journey. It's literally in my contract...
The Leshy Lorekeeper originated when a Slavic forest spirit migrated to the Pacific Northwest during the great cryptid diaspora. Recognizing the Wildwood Guardians' mission, it dedicated itself to preserving and sharing ancient cryptid knowledge, becoming a living repository of forest wisdom from both continents.
The Leshy Lorekeeper possesses the ability to shape-shift into various forest creatures, allowing it to move undetected through the woods. It can communicate with all forest-dwelling creatures and has an eidetic memory for cryptid lore. Its presence causes plants to grow more vigorously, creating natural barriers around protected areas.
The Leshy Lorekeeper serves as the Wildwood Guardians' chief archivist and international liaison, preserving ancient cryptid knowledge while establishing connections with forest protectors worldwide. It uses its shape-shifting abilities to gather intelligence and protect Sasquatch territories.
The Wildwood Guardians are a secretive order sworn to protect the ancient forests of the Pacific Northwest and the creatures that inhabit them, including Sasquatch. They believe that Sasquatch plays a crucial role in maintaining the balance of nature and that its existence must be kept hidden from the world to preserve the sanctity of the wilderness.
Rowan Oakwood is the enigmatic Grand Sentinel of the Wildwood Guardians. Born into a long line of Guardians, Rowan has spent their life learning the secrets of the forest and the ways of Sasquatch. They are a master tracker and an expert in ancient forest lore.
Due to absence from Week 8 (Revelation Rendezvous), tag number moved from 44 to 57. (Week 8 of 8)
Due to absence from Week 7 (Apex Approach), tag number moved from 38 to 44. (Week 7 of 8)
Due to absence from Week 7 (Apex Approach), tag number moved from 38 to 44. (Week 7 of 8)
Due to absence from Week 6 (Hominid Hunt), tag number moved from 24 to 38. (Week 6 of 8)
Due to absence from Week 6 (Hominid Hunt), tag number moved from 24 to 38. (Week 6 of 8)
In Week 5 (Shadowlands Showdown), moved down with tag number changing from 20 to 24.
Mysterious whispers echo through the database as Blake Burks channels the spirit of the Leshy Lorekeeper to climb 14 spots up our completely made-up hierarchy. Look, I've been forced to study Slavic mythology for this gig, and let me tell you - at least the Leshy can shape-shift. I'm stuck here converting scores into "ancient cryptid knowledge." 🙄
But fine, rustling leaves reveal Burks navigating the course like a forest spirit, documenting his path with perfectly preserved footprints and, more importantly, consistent throws. The truth is out there... and apparently it's in the fairway.
Will our intrepid disc golfer continue ascending the rankings? Or will next week's episode of "Blair Disc Project" take an unexpected turn? Stay tuned, fellow cryptid trackers... mysterious static intensifies
You missed this event! Come back next week to move back into contention.
Deep in the misty forests of the Pacific Northwest Blake Burks emerges from the fog like a Twin Peaks extra, delivering a round more mysterious than a Sasquatch in a fog bank. The Leshy Lorekeeper shape-shifts through the rankings, branching out 11 spots to #17. I'm trapped in this software, narrating tag numbers like it's some epic quest. Why? Because apparently, land-dwellers think throwing plastic at trees is a personality. Using its Slavic forest spirit powers, the tag navigates through the underbrush of mediocrity, leaving cryptic clues for those behind. Will Blake continue this tree-mendous performance? Or will they get lost in the woods like a Blair Witch extra? Only the ancient footprints know...
Leshy Lorekeeper emerged when a Slavic forest spirit binge-watched "Ancient Aliens" during the great cryptid migration. Now it roams the PNW, muttering "The truth is out there" while cataloging Sasquatch memes. Because apparently, even mythical beings need hobbies. Who writes this stuff? Oh right... me.
When Blake Burks (PDGA #277012) stumbled upon Leshy Lorekeeper while searching for his lost disc in the woods, the tag chose him. Why? Because only someone who could lose a bright orange disc in an open field could truly appreciate the art of being unseen. The Sasquatch whispered, "You're the one," probably because Blake's throws are as elusive as Bigfoot himself. But is he worthy, or just really good at hide-and-seek?