Face Reveal

dramatic horror sting Well, here we are documenting another week of this B-movie disc golf nightmare... 🎬

Skeleton Crew Production Values

adjusts digital chains Welcome to Week 5's "Face Reveal" episode, where seven players showed up to what was supposed to be a twenty-person psychological thriller. The Fort Buenaventura hosted this indie horror production in crisp 52°F weather with clear skies—perfect conditions for what turned into more art house film than blockbuster. The promised dramatic unmasking at hole 9's elevated platform? More like everyone revealing their eagle-making abilities instead of betraying each other. 🎭

The Bogey-Free Body Count

In MPO, Malachi Vazquez and Landon Adams locked horns in a bogey-free battle royale, both carding identical -16 rounds with multiple lead changes throughout. Malachi claimed victory on the countback, seizing the psychological high ground while Landon had to settle for second place in this two-man thriller. Meanwhile, Bryant Adams struggled to a -11 finish, shooting 26 points below his rating—sometimes the horror gets to you, even at championship level. The real horror sting? Both leaders went completely clean on their scorecards. 🔥

Back Nine From The Dead

MA4 delivered the episode's most dramatic resurrection story as Matt Williams and Abraham Vidinhar deadlocked at -5, with Abraham winning the countback. But the real plot twist belonged to Matt, who clawed back from a rough front nine with an incredible 9-stroke improvement on the back, nearly stealing the division title in classic zombie comeback fashion. Abraham, meanwhile, shot 23 points above rating—proving that sometimes the underdogs rise when the fog clears. 📈

Solo Screening in MA3

Skyler Kunz enjoyed a private horror show in MA3, running unopposed to a -8 victory with a clutch birdie on 18. Nothing says "final survivor" quite like being the only one left in your division, though Skyler made sure to finish with style rather than just coast to the credits. When you're the star of your own one-person show, might as well make it memorable. 🎯

Everyone Eagles, Nobody Aces

Seven players combined for an absolutely absurd 20 eagles, including three albatrosses on hole 4 and three more on hole 18. Yet somehow, despite all this aerial carnage, not a single ace was recorded. The $624 ace pot continues growing faster than our body count, while the $1000 Super Ace on hole 16 remains as elusive as a competent horror movie sequel. Both MPO leaders went bogey-free, because apparently consistency is the real killer at The Fort. 🦅

New Management, Same Nightmares

Malachi Vazquez claimed the Fear Broker tag #1, turning the psychological manipulator's own tools against the field with surgical precision. This architect of atmospheric dread found its perfect match in a player who went bogey-free while orchestrating a -16 masterpiece. The vintage leather satchel filled with psychological triggers now serves a master who can weaponize fear and consistency in equal measure. Sometimes the best way to handle a fear merchant is to out-psych them at their own game. 🧠

Cursed Money Stays Cursed

Despite all those eagles soaring around The Fort, the special event pots remained as untouchable as a cursed artifact. No aces, no CTPs, no Super Aces claimed—just a growing collection of unclaimed prize money that seems determined to outlast our entire cast. The curse of The Fort continues: players can eagle everything but ace nothing. Even in a horror film, some things are too predictable. 💰

The Real Horror? Attendance 😱

The real plot twist of this "Face Reveal" episode wasn't betrayal at hole 9's platform—it was seven players showing up to what was supposed to be a twenty-person league. The eagles weren't the betrayal; the empty tee times were. Meanwhile, our skeleton crew still managed to contribute $8.75 to the USWDGC 2026 fund, pushing us to 95% of our $10,000 goal because apparently fundraising continues even during the apocalypse.

Chase Scene With What Army?

At the midpoint of our horror saga, we've got more eagles than players and a field that's dwindled to truly skeleton crew status. Next week's "Chase Scene" promises pursuit through the wooded sections, but honestly, who's left to chase whom? The survivors feast while the course remains hungry for more victims. Will anyone else show up for Episode 6, or are we pivoting to a minimalist art film? 🏃‍♂️