Creek Crossing

The Eels Went Hungry Tonight 🦈

Week 3 of The Princess Glide @ Creekside saw thirty players venture into the "Creek Crossing" episode, where the registration email promised Shrieking Eels would feast on shanked discs and water hazards would claim souls. The forecast delivered suspiciously perfect conditions—37°F to 50°F with gentle winds—yet somehow the eels starved. Not a single ace punctured the $215.44 pot, and the $731 Super Ace on hole 14 (the creek-adjacent danger zone) remained untouched. The enchanted forest proved forgiving to discs but merciless to egos, as rating swings reached "inconceivable" territory and the #1 bag tag changed captains in the most unexpected way possible.

The Pirate Ship Changed Captains ⚓

Clayton Rackham seized the throne with a bogey-free -10 round that rated 992—a staggering +53 above his 939 rating—and vaulted from #19 to claim the #1 Fezzik's Feat bag tag. His wire-to-wire dominance in RPA was surgical: ten birdies, eight pars, zero mistakes. Meanwhile, last week's Dread Pirate commander Malachi Vazquez crashed from his -16 glory to a -3 ninth-place finish, a 167-rating-point swing that dropped him seven strokes behind Clayton's lead. Jared Lang's clean -9 (1006 rating) secured second place, while Ben Marolf's flawless -8 bogey-free round earned the podium. Five RPA players posted bogey-free rounds, proving that when you navigate Creekside's enchanted forest without error, the kingdom rewards you handsomely. 🏆

One Birdie to Rule the Division 🏹

RAD's championship came down to a single birdie on hole 18. Marvin Atene threaded the needle with a -4 round (50 strokes, 912 rating) that saw his back nine outpace his front by four strokes. His clutch birdie on the final hole sealed a one-stroke victory over a three-way tie for second: Kent Moos, Nicholas Jennings, and Chad Mills all finished at -3. Jennings held the lead until a double bogey on hole 15 cost him the crown—a brutal reminder that in Florin's quest, one catastrophic miscalculation can dethrone you. Marvin's sole birdie on hole 17 set up the dramatic finish, and his steady par-3 execution across the back nine proved that sometimes the farmboy who refuses to panic wins the day.

The Guilder Throne Has Two Kings 👑

RAE produced a rare tie at the top: Michael Whipple and Jon White both posted -5 rounds (49 strokes), with Michael rating 925 (+59 above his 866 rating!) and Jon delivering a clean 919. The co-championship was earned through contrasting paths—Michael's six birdies and one bogey matched Jon's six birdies and one bogey in a display of parallel excellence. Brodie Duncan's -3 secured third place despite claiming three sole birdies (holes 1, 12, and 18), proving that even owning the card's toughest holes doesn't guarantee the throne when two kings refuse to blink. Peter Haws and Rodrigo Ornelas struggled with below-rating performances, finishing at +4 and +5 respectively, as the enchanted forest demanded precision they couldn't summon.

Wire-to-Wire Farmboy Dominance 🌾

Kevin Koga led RAF from start to finish with a personal-best -2 round that rated 885—a massive +87 above his 798 rating. His wire-to-wire victory in the three-player division was never in doubt, as he carded fourteen pars, three birdies, and one bogey in a display of calculated consistency. Abraham Vidinhar finished second at -1 despite enduring six lead changes—all of which ended in bogeys that cost him ground. His roller-coaster round couldn't match Kevin's steady farmboy discipline. Matt Berman rounded out the division at +3, and the small field size only amplified Kevin's dominance: when you're the only player not bleeding strokes, the throne is yours by default. 🥇

Samuel Fed the Eels Seven Times 🦑

RAG's two-player showdown saw William Fetzer's even-par round (54 strokes, 858 rating) dominate Samuel Smith's +8 struggle by eight strokes. William's clean execution—three birdies, twelve pars, three bogeys—rated +76 above his 782 rating, proving that sometimes the enchanted forest simply chooses its champion and refuses all challengers. Samuel's seven bogeys, one birdie, and nine pars told the story of a round where the Shrieking Eels (metaphorically) devoured every mistake. In a division this small, there's nowhere to hide: William's precision exposed every gap in Samuel's game, and the eight-stroke margin reflected the gulf between them. The eels may not have claimed any discs from the creek, but they feasted on Samuel's scorecard.

The Loneliest Throne in Florin 👑

Trenton Sexton posted -3 (51 strokes) as RAH's sole competitor, claiming a wire-to-wire victory by default. His 899-rated round finished 44 points below his 943 rating, but when you're the only player in the division, the throne is yours regardless of execution quality. Trenton's five birdies, twelve pars, and one bogey would've been competitive in other divisions, but here they simply existed in a vacuum—a performance with no witnesses, no rivals, no stakes. The loneliest throne in Florin is still a throne, and Trenton held it without contest. Sometimes the quest chooses you simply because you showed up.

The Rating Swings Were Inconceivable 💥

The statistical chaos was pure Princess Bride: Kevin Koga (+87), William Fetzer (+76), Michael Whipple (+59), and Clayton Rackham (+53) all massively outperformed their ratings, while Rodrigo Ornelas (-108) and Brian Hansen (-75) cratered in spectacular fashion. Five bogey-free rounds (Clayton, Ben, Jared, Ethan Jorgensen, and Byron Jorgensen) proved that Creekside's enchanted forest rewards flawless execution, while five personal bests (Kent Moos, Michael Whipple, Kevin Koga, Casey Turner, and William Fetzer) showed that the course can elevate players to new heights. Brodie Duncan claimed three sole birdies on holes 1, 12, and 18—the card's toughest—yet finished third in RAE, a testament to how competitive the division was. Fourteen players rode par trains of five or more holes, suggesting that once you find rhythm at Creekside, the momentum carries you forward. 📊

Clayton Climbed the Cliffs of Insanity 🧗

Clayton Rackham didn't just win RPA—he vaulted from #19 to #1, claiming the Fezzik's Feat bag tag in a 19-to-1 ascent that mirrors the tag's origin story. Forged in the memory of the Cliffs of Insanity, where Fezzik lifted his companions to safety through sheer strength and loyalty, this tag embodies the philosophy that overwhelming power applied with gentle precision conquers impossible challenges. Clayton's +53 rating differential wasn't flashy—it was steady, loyal strength executed without ego. His bogey-free -10 matched his personal average while demolishing the field, proving that Fezzik's Feat doesn't choose champions for flash, but for disciplined competence applied without hesitation. The tag's lore describes it as "a steadfast anchor in chaos," and Clayton's wire-to-wire dominance validated that identity. From passenger to flag-bearer in The Princess Glide narrative, he's now the disc golf equivalent of Westley arriving at the Cliffs with clear head and stubborn resolve. The tag's properties—"cool and smooth, yet radiating a palpable, steady warmth of unwavering support"—found their perfect vessel in a player who climbed the leaderboard by simply refusing to make mistakes.

The Shrieking Eels Guarded the Gold 🦈

The $946.44 treasure hoard remains unclaimed. The $215.44 Ace Pot sat untouched across all 30 players, and the $731 Super Ace on hole 14—the creek-adjacent danger zone the registration email warned about—saw zero challengers pierce the chains. The Shrieking Eels, it seems, protected the gold through sheer intimidation: not a single player dared test the waters with enough accuracy to claim the bounty. Week 4's "Roller's Revenge" episode will see the treasure grow even larger, and Inigo Montoya's roller-only challenge may finally coax someone into feeding the eels their long-awaited feast. Until then, the gold sits in Humperdinck's vault, mocking every player who shanked a throw toward the creek.

Three Cards Opted for Violence 💰

Fourteen players across three skins cards moved $198 in side duels, and Ben Marolf claimed the crown with a 9-skin, $45 carryover scoop on hole 15 that validated his bogey-free -8 round. Jared Lang banked 8 skins ($40) on his clean -9 performance, while Casey Turner collected 6 skins ($30) on his -6 finish. The carryover drama on Ben's card built through fourteen holes before his birdie on 15 broke the tension and emptied the pot. Only three cards opted for violence, but those who did found the financial stakes added weight to every throw—proof that when you bet on yourself at Creekside, the enchanted forest either rewards or punishes with equal ferocity. Any card can enable skins for future rounds—learn how to set up skins and add financial chaos to your Monday night quest.

The Enchanted Forest Funded Itself 🌲

The "Creek Crossing" episode advanced Westley's quest as he encountered Vizzini's hired specialists for the first time—and Clayton Rackham's RPA dominance became the disc golf answer to that duel. The Princess Glide remains stolen, but the heroes proved they can navigate the creek's hazards without feeding the eels, setting up next week's roller-only showdown with Inigo Montoya. Meanwhile, the Creekside Course Fund collected $32.75 this week (including automatic $1/player contributions), pushing the total to $1,135.41—113% of the $1,000 goal. The OB stakes project is complete, and the enchanted forest is better for it.

Week 4: Inigo Prepares His Rollers 🗡️

"Roller's Revenge" awaits on Monday, where Inigo Montoya steps forward to challenge Westley in a roller-only duel across Creekside's tightest lines. Clayton Rackham carries the #1 Fezzik's Feat tag as a target on his back, and the $946.44 treasure hoard grows hungrier by the week. Six weeks remain to storm Humperdinck's castle and recover the Princess Glide. As you wish... to return next week and see if the eels finally feast. 🏰