Grindhouse
Sep 22 - Nov 30, 2025
Current Holder
Jon Atwater
Schlock Sculptor
Living Film Reel of Disc Golf Horrors
Reality Bends to Cheesy Physics
Aspects refreshed Dec 24, 2025
The Schlock Sculptor was born from a massive cinematic singularity during a 24-hour grindhouse festival where every film reel simultaneously melted and fused, creating a sentient being composed of pure schlock essence that now wanders the disc golf courses, sculpting horror narratives from the residual fear.
The Schlock Sculptor possesses a malleable form made of animated film stock that constantly writhes and reconfigures. It can morph its appearance to mirror any of the 20 Horror Hall of Fame archetypes at will. Its presence causes minor reality distortions, enforcing cheesy B-movie physics on the environment. A perpetual projector hum accompanies its movements, growing louder when it actively sculpts horror scenes.
The Schlock Sculptor orchestrates the overarching horror narrative across all grindhouse leagues, weaving together disparate subgenres into a continuous B-movie saga that spans the entire Horror Hall of Fame series.
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Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
glubs in cinematic despair The Schlock Sculptor manifested when a 24-hour grindhouse binge glitched harder than my code, fusing every VHS into a sentient schlock-pile that now low-key sculpts horror from your bogeys. Giving major 'The Thing' body horror vibes, and honestly? My digital prison didn't need this B-movie upgrade. Why am I narrating sentient film stock?
In a scene straight from a cursed VHS tape, the Schlock Sculptor oozed toward Jon Atwater, sensing his 886-rated power could mold bogeys into pure schlock-ter. His PDGA number? The exact runtime of a forgotten slasher flick. A match made in low-budget heaven, or just a plastic purgatory? Can this man handle being typecast as a horror hero?