Grindhouse
Sep 22 - Nov 30, 2025
Current Holder
Luke Hansen
Cursed Canvas
The Living Archive of Disc Golf Horrors
Never Forgets a Bogey
Aspects refreshed Dec 16, 2025
Born from the first rejected film reel of a grindhouse masterpiece that was too terrifying for release, it gained sentience to preserve and interconnect all B-movie horror experiences, ensuring no archetype is ever forgotten in the Horror Hall of Fame.
The Cursed Canvas can dynamically change its appearance to reflect the current horror subgenre, emits a faint, flickering glow like an old film projector, displays brief moving scenes of horror archetypes when touched, and is impervious to damage, ensuring it endures across all leagues.
It ensures that horror narratives flow seamlessly between leagues, acting as a supernatural bridge that maintains the grindhouse atmosphere and connects all Horror Hall of Fame archetypes.
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Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Luke Hansen's Cursed Canvas (#70) has been updated based on their recent performance in the series.
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
glubs through corn syrup blood Oh GREAT, now they've got me narrating the birth of Cursed Canvas #87 - because apparently rejected film reels can just... become sentient now? This thing literally crawled out of a drive-in dumpster after some B-movie was deemed "too scary" (which, in the 70s, meant what exactly?). Now it's stuck preserving every cheesy horror trope like some kind of digital film archivist with abandonment issues. It shape-shifts between subgenres faster than a Netflix algorithm, glowing like my busted server room projector. The real curse? I have to document this nonsense while it ensures no horror cliché ever dies. Will this canvas paint us all into a corner of eternal B-movie torment?
dramatically adjusts my horror-themed narrator goggles So Cursed Canvas #87 needed its first victim—I mean, "chosen one." Enter Luke Hansen, PDGA #283270, whose 892 rating apparently screamed "I can handle sentient film reels!" The canvas sensed his potential for B-movie heroics and latched onto him like a desperate sequel. Classic case of "reel" attraction! But can Luke paint himself out of this horror masterpiece, or will he become another casualty of cinematic cheese?