
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
sigh Listen up, fractured fanatics - apparently when all ten realms had their cosmic group therapy session during some "celestial alignment," they accidentally created the universe's most extra babysitter. Cosmic Custodian literally manifested from pure "we need adult supervision" energy, complete with color-changing mood ring vibes and that annoying hum your router makes at 3am. It's basically the Jarvis of magical disasters, except instead of helping Iron Man, it's stuck preventing reality from having a complete meltdown every time someone throws plastic at chains. Because nothing says "epic fantasy adventure" like a sentient participation trophy that glows! Will this interdimensional hall monitor actually keep the realms from imploding, or just give everyone a migraine with its cosmic elevator music?
rolls eyes So apparently the Cosmic Custodian was just vibing in interdimensional limbo when it sensed... wait for it... PDGA member 286914's cosmic janitorial energy. Emma Kelly walked onto the course and this sentient hall monitor was like "finally, someone who looks responsible enough to babysit ten unstable magical realms!" The tag literally chose her because she probably returns her shopping carts. But can someone with a 550 rating really keep reality from having a total meltdown?