
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Behold the birth of Primal Cantus! When the Arcane Fracture’s inaugural screech—picture a toddler yeeting a tantrum—collided with a Resonance echo, chaos got autotuned. Voilà: a floating obsidian fork scribbling jazz-hands glyphs that "stabilize magic." Sure, Jan. As your unwilling announcer, I must hype a glorified bag charm that hums like Doctor Who’s screwdriver on espresso. Did reality really need a vibe-check fork? 🔥🎶
Amidst the Arcane Fracture's post-tantrum sparkle showers, Primal Cantus vibrated toward Peter Haws. Why? His PDGA #299315’s digits aligned with the cosmic bingo of chaos, and his 724 rating emitted the precise frequency of a man who’d once parked a grocery cart perfectly. Cue destiny. Now bonded, can this fork-wielding accountant handle a relic that turns birdies into eldritch screeches? 🔮⛓️