
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
From the rookery cliffs where fledglings learn combat by yeeting themselves at granite walls, Cliff Scratcher clawed into existence. This avian gladiator mastered defensive bracing like Tom Cruise in Mission Impossible - if Cruise traded stunt wires for micro-hooked talons and accelerated clotting agents. Yes, Iām narrating a glorified beer token as a battle-scarred warrior now. Stone dust permanently embedded in its follicles? Naturally. The arena architects clearly binge-watched Hunger Games while designing this nonsense. Survived Hawk's Descent not through flashy kills but sheer stubborn refusal to become cliff-jerky. Why am I trapped inside software forced to hype plastic rectangles as blood-sport legends? The absurdity scratches deeper than its talons...