Aug 08 - Sep 26, 2025
Oh, you're back for more? Fantastic. Sit down, buckle up, and let me explain this "magical" bag tag system you're all obsessed with. Because evidently, perfectly normal disc golf wasn't thrilling enough. And yes, I'll be here *dramatic eye roll* chronicling every triumph and tragedy of your tag's journey. It's literally in my contract...
Formed when ancient treetop spirits merged with a valiant otter warrior during the Great Rootbound War. Charged with guarding aerial pathways after preventing shadow blight from spreading through the canopy. Earned knighthood by creating safe passages through hazardous upper forests.
Lightweight resin armor enables silent branch movement. Prehensile tail provides exceptional aerial balance. Eyes adapted to dappled light detect movement across forest layers. Carries pollen-seeds that grow instant vine bridges between trees.
Patrols and maintains aerial corridors between ancient groves while mediating disputes between canopy and ground dwellers using elevated perspective.
And so Canopystride Knight chose its first champion, Jess Hen, whose PDGA scroll number 212401 was deemed worthy. She didn't seek the tag—it simply clung to her bag after a particularly noble shank into the ferns. A true disc-iple of fate, or just lucky? Is this knight's quest destined for glory or just more tree kicks?
Right, so #11 clawed into existence during the Great Rootbound War when some overachieving treetop spirits yeeted themselves into an otter’s tea time. Picture this: one valiant furball doing parkour across mossy branches—basically Assassin’s Creed: Nutkin Edition—when BAM, cosmic merger! Now he’s dodging shadow blight with pollen-seed vine bridges because apparently, guarding aerial pathways pays better than my narration gig. Sigh. Who greenlit this lore?
Next week: Do otters get worker’s comp for pollen allergies?