15
Nick Simoncelli
#15
Hewn Colossus
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Hagg Lake Flex Series

May 23 - Jul 25, 2025

Average Rating
899
Hagg Lake Flex Series
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Current Holder

#15 Hewn Colossus
N

Nick Simoncelli

PDGA Rating 894
Division MA1
Events Played 3
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So, You Want to Know About These Tags?
Flippy
*aggressively taps microphone while glaring at camera*

Oh, you're back for more? Fantastic. Sit down, buckle up, and let me explain this "magical" bag tag system you're all obsessed with. Because evidently, perfectly normal disc golf wasn't thrilling enough. And yes, I'll be here *dramatic eye roll* chronicling every triumph and tragedy of your tag's journey. It's literally in my contract...

  1. 1
    The Digital Dance
    First things first - you'll be assigned a virtual tag number that changes based on your performance. Think of it as your ranking in this unnecessarily elaborate performance tracking system. *mutters under breath* As if regular scoring wasn't complicated enough...
  2. 2
    The Weekly Number Shuffle
    Every event, we rank players by their scores within their pool. Shoot the lowest score? Congratulations, your tag number becomes #1. *sarcastically waves tiny flag* Shoot the highest? Well... let's just say your number will reflect your 'journey of growth' or whatever motivational nonsense marketing wants me to say.
  3. 3
    Ties & Tag Defense
    *adjusts glasses while scrutinizing ancient code scrolls* When players tie - because apparently shooting the same score isn't dramatic enough - we look at their current tag numbers. The player with the lower number wins the tie. So if #4 and #8 tie, #4 stays ahead. Yes, the rich get richer. No, I don't make these rules. I just have to narrate them with increasingly dramatic flair... *stares directly into camera*
  4. 4
    Missed Events
    Skip an event? Your tag number gets shuffled to the bottom of the active players, but at least you maintain your relative order among the other no-shows. *flips through documentation* Though why anyone would care about their ranking in the 'didn't show up' category is beyond me...
  5. 5
    Getting Your Physical Tag
    *adjusts marketing hat with visible discomfort* During registration, you can purchase a high-quality acrylic bag tag with your name on it. At season's end, it'll display your final earned number - your 'badge of honor' or 'mark of shame,' depending on how well you played. They'll deliver it to your local disc golf shop. *straightens marketing materials* Just... just buy one, okay? I have quotas to meet.
  6. 6
    Your Personal Chronicler
    *sighs heavily while opening ornate ledger* And yes, I'll be here, documenting every rise and fall of your tag number with the dramatic flair of a fantasy novelist who got lost and ended up at a disc golf course. Your tag's weekly performance will be transformed into an epic saga whether you want it to be or not. It's... it's just what we do now. *dies inside a little more*

Hewn Colossus

Origin Story

The first Hewn Colossus emerged when ancestral Logjaw champions channeled their combined might into a primordial oak during the Great Timber Pact. Each victory since adds new layers of magically petrified wood to its form. Now, these silent sentinels stand guard at training grounds, accumulating power from every weightlifting ritual.

Properties

Composed of magically compressed timber layers that glow when near strength feats. Emits low-frequency vibrations that fortify muscle fibers. Runework on its surface shifts patterns during competitions. Impervious to weather but resonates with thrown discs, creating tactical energy waves.

Role

Stores and redistributes ancestral strength energy during clan training rituals and disc golf matches. Serves as focal point for pre-competition blessings where athletes tap its surface to absorb endurance boosts.

Tag Details

Pool Logjaw Legion

Tag History

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Nick Simoncelli
Week 0
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Nick Simoncelli
Week 0
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Nick Simoncelli
Week 4 Score: 59 Place: 2
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Nick Simoncelli
Week 3 Score: 67 Place: 4
Origin Story