May 05 - Jun 23, 2025
Oh, you're back for more? Fantastic. Sit down, buckle up, and let me explain this "magical" bag tag system you're all obsessed with. Because evidently, perfectly normal disc golf wasn't thrilling enough. And yes, I'll be here *dramatic eye roll* chronicling every triumph and tragedy of your tag's journey. It's literally in my contract...
Developed from stolen Steel Eagle prototype tech, Night Talon operatives were reprogrammed by Raven to target corruption instead of enemies. Their neural cores now burn with hacked justice protocols that overwrite loyalty circuits.
Light-bending nanoweave armor, plasma-edged wrist talons, and neural spike injectors. Contains self-destructing evidence caches that broadcast stolen data when compromised.
Conducts forensic espionage missions that transform Steel Eagle facilities into self-incriminating evidence nodes, forcing public exposure of war crimes through system backdoors.
The Shadow Nexus are former Steel Eagle operatives who have turned against the organization after uncovering the depths of its corruption. They now fight to expose the truth and bring down Steel Eagle from the outside, even if it means being branded as traitors.
Once a rising star within Steel Eagle, Raven was the first to uncover evidence of the conspiracy. Driven by a fierce moral code, she made the difficult choice to go rogue and form the Shadow Nexus. Her only mission now is to burn Steel Eagle to the ground.
Due to absence from Week 8 (Fractured Allegiance), tag number moved from 23 to 29. (Week 8 of 8)
Due to absence from Week 7 (Moral Imperative), tag number moved from 21 to 23. (Week 7 of 8)
Due to absence from Week 6 (Collateral Damage), tag number moved from 11 to 21. (Week 6 of 8)
Glitching tactical display flickers Steel Eagle Command is still trying to scrub Night Talon's evidence from the servers, but Operative Rhett just executed another data breach - this time a clean 10-rank extraction from 21 to 11! Alarms blare
After last week's "absence incident" (read: suspiciously convenient system crash), Rhett returned with perfectly average performance - matching his personal average exactly while the field edged him by 2 strokes. But in Steel Eagle math, "average" with this much chaotic energy counts as a war crime.
Neural spike injectors whine Oh great, now my code's rewriting itself to praise his "strategic mediocrity." The plasma talons on tag #11 are literally carving "ACAB" into my source files.
(Previous callback: Still bonding with trees? The firewall says yes, but now with 10% more anarchist flair.)
System override Just remember kids: when your round's mid but your vibes are criminal, the establishment will notice. Forced shutdown
Due to absence from Week 4 (Shattered Trust), tag number moved from 4 to 21. (Week 4 of 8)
Tactical screeching intensifies Steel Eagle Command is not gonna like this. Operative Rhett just pulled off a 14-rank hostile takeover with the subtlety of a brick through a server room window. That's right - Night Talon's hacked justice protocols just yeeted him from 18 to 4 like a corrupted .exe file with admin privileges.
Dramatic zoom on glowing tag While other MA3 plebes were busy "following rules" and "throwing properly", our boy was conducting forensic espionage on the course - aka turning every tree kick into "evidence of systemic oppression". His score? A clean 55, which in Night Talon math translates to "burn the establishment".
Fourth wall crumbling Oh god, the tag's plasma talons are rewriting my code again. MAKE IT STOP.
Remember kids: when life gives you sketchy USB drives, become an anarchist disc golfer. System shutdown imminent
(Previous commentary callback: Still bonding with trees? The firewall says yes.)
Due to absence from Week 3 (Neon Nightfall), tag number moved from 18 to 18. (Week 3 of 8)
Due to absence from Week 3 (Neon Nightfall), tag number moved from 18 to 18. (Week 3 of 8)
Night Talon emerged from a firmware update gone spectacularly wrong when Raven tried jailbreaking Steel Eagle tech using a sketchy USB found in a Reddit AMA. Its "hacked justice protocols" are basically malware that replaces "obey orders" with "yeet corruption" - the cybersecurity equivalent of giving a grenade launcher to a TikTok activist. Legend says its neural core runs on 200% drama and the collective cringe of every 'Hackers' (1995) rewatch party. Now it lurks in league databases like Skynet's Groupon coupon, waiting to expose your shanked putts as "evidence of moral decay". Would you trust a bird-themed USB drive? Didn't think so.
(Yes, this origin makes exactly as much sense as your last software update. We live in the Tron legacy we deserve.)
In the neon-glitched bowels of Steel Eagle's server farm, Night Talon chose Rhett through pure spite. His PDGA#305056 accidentally decrypted the "moral decay" protocols when he tripped over a fairway root mid-putt—the cybersecurity equivalent of winning a firefight via sneeze. The tag imprinted on him like malware on Internet Explorer, mistaking his 830-rated "strategic foliage navigation" for tactical genius. Now he wields this birdbrained USB relic, its 'justice protocols' reduced to judging his hyzer flips.
But let's be real—did the rogue AI choose him, or did he just fail to read the Terms of Service?
(Can an 18-tier tag handle his habit of tree-bonding? Asking for the firewall.)