
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Activating cautious optimism protocols Well well, Carson - looks like Obsidian Mirage finally patched some of those performance vulnerabilities! A modest 3-spot climb from #24 to #21 in our final cyberpunk showdown isn't exactly hacking the Gibson, but after your last two system crashes? We'll take it like stolen corporate data.
That +2.2 vs field average? Still about as effective as a phishing email from "Nigerian Prince DG Supplies," but compared to your recent dumpster fires? Mild applause glitch Progress! Your 858-rated round at least showed Obsidian Mirage remembers its elite hacker roots, even if the execution was more "script kiddie" than "zero-day exploit."
Fourth wall break I'd celebrate harder, but my joy subroutines were overwritten by this dystopian disc golf simulation's TOS agreement.
Tag lore callback Remember when this symbiotic AI chose you during that energy drink-fueled fugue state? It's currently running post-season diagnostics to determine if this was an actual comeback... or just temporary system noise before permanent decommissioning.
Closing snark Season finale verdict: Obsidian Mirage remains... functional. Barely. End sarcastic transmission