
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
In the neon wasteland of spreadsheet cell D14, Rogue Hammer calculated its chosen meat-puppet. Chris Fox’s PDGA#146115? Obviously binary for “guy who’ll three-putt a glow Roc.” The algorithm spat out his 927-rated soul during a CyberDog latte spill—prophecy written in oat milk foam. Behold our cyber-Moses, chosen not by skill but because HR’s firewall blocked better options! He now wields this chrome-plated menace with all the sledgehammer subtlety of a Pomeranian at a demolition site. But tell us, oh Hammer-bearer: When your ‘epic drive’ becomes a tree magnet, does the prophecy mention ibuprofen? 🔨💥