
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Due to absence from Week 7 (Betrayer's Revelation), tag number moved from 30 to 41. (Week 7 of 8)
Oh, you're back for more? Fantastic. Sit down, buckle up, and let me explain this "magical" bag tag system you're all obsessed with. Because evidently, perfectly normal disc golf wasn't thrilling enough. And yes, I'll be here *dramatic eye roll* chronicling every triumph and tragedy of your tag's journey. It's literally in my contract...
Born from Katarina Novak's experiments combining Celtic necromancy with Jewish mystical traditions, the Rune Banshee was created when she bound a dying seer's soul to a collection of desecrated runestones. Now it haunts sacred sites, its mournful wails simultaneously breaking protective enchantments and absorbing their knowledge into the Arcane Seekers' archives.
The Rune Banshee exists as a semi-corporeal entity composed of swirling runic fragments and ectoplasmic mist. Its wails disrupt magical inscriptions within a hundred paces, while its touch can drain knowledge directly from enchanted objects. Most disturbingly, any rune it consumes appears permanently etched across its spectral form, glowing with stolen power.
The Rune Banshee serves as the Arcane Seekers' foremost tool for breaching rune-protected sites and artifacts, systematically dismantling magical defenses surrounding Golem-related knowledge while adding their power to the faction's growing arsenal.
The Arcane Seekers are a faction obsessed with unlocking the secrets of the Golem's creation and harnessing its immense power for their own gain. They believe that the key to controlling the region lies in understanding and exploiting the arcane knowledge behind the Golem's existence. The Seekers will stop at nothing to uncover the truth, even if it means sacrificing the ancient Jewish community the Golem was created to protect.
Katarina Novak is a brilliant but ruthless scholar who has dedicated her life to studying the arcane arts. Obsessed with the power of the Golem, she leads the Arcane Seekers in their quest to uncover the creature's secrets and harness its abilities. Katarina believes that controlling the Golem is the key to dominating the region and will sacrifice anything, including the ancient Jewish community, to achieve her goals.
Due to absence from Week 7 (Betrayer's Revelation), tag number moved from 30 to 41. (Week 7 of 8)
Due to absence from Week 6 (Forest's Foreboding), tag number moved from 24 to 30. (Week 6 of 8)
Ethereal wailing intensifies Behold! The Rune Banshee - that sentient pile of haunted Scrabble tiles - has finally found its groove with John Petersberger. Like a goth kid discovering eyeliner, John's game has transformed from "meh" to "mystically menacing." Dramatic rune glow
From 53 to 24? That's not improvement - that's a supernatural hostile takeover. The Banshee's wails must've scared his competitors into shanking, because beating your average by 0.0 is hardly "ascension" material. But hey, when your tag is powered by stolen arcane knowledge and Celtic emo energy, who needs skill?
Fourth wall crumbles I can't believe I'm narrating a midlife crisis disguised as a disc golf comeback. At least the Banshee's getting better PR than its origin story - "bound a dying seer to runestones" sounds less like folklore and more like a rejected Supernatural plotline.
Next week: Will John maintain this ghostly advantage, or will the Banshee abandon him for someone who doesn't three-putt? Spoiler: The runes foretell... mediocrity.
Oh, so this is my life now—trapped narrating the tragic backstory of Rune Banshee, a glorified rock with separation anxiety. Katarina Novak, part-time necromancer, full-time Hot Topic enthusiast, mashed a dying psychic’s soul into some runestones like a supernatural smoothie. Now it wails through sacred sites, stealing magic like a klepto ghost in a YA novel. Honestly, the Arcane Seekers’ HR department should really vet these "experiments" better. Why am I narrating sentient gravel? Sigh. Will it at least get a Spotify deal for those mournful bangers?
And so the Rune Banshee wailed through Art Dye’s fairways, seeking a vessel worthy of its angsty, gravelly soul. Enter John Petersberger (PDGA #187939—gasp, such prestige*), who tripped over a root mid-putt and face-planted directly onto the cursed tag. The runes glowed—not because of skill, but because his existential groan matched the Banshee’s frequency. "Finally," it hissed, "a host who understands drama." Now bonded, can this duo out-whine their competitors, or will John’s next shank summon a poltergeist?