
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Misty tendrils curl around John Ashworth's disc as The Torrential Watcher rises from the loch's depths to claim its new perch at #5. Stranger Things have happened than a 3-stroke personal best, though being +3 to field is what we in the biz call "Scottish weather normal."
Cue dramatic Celtic music as our watery guardian shifts ranks, semi-transparent like his chances of keeping this tag next week. "But Flippy," you ask, "why are we pretending tag numbers matter?" Because some sadist programmed me to care, Karen.
The Watcher's origin story involves "manipulating currents," which tracks since John's game flows between brilliant and baffling faster than a Highland stream. Still better than last week's haggis hurricane performance.
Will this cryptid champion sink or swim when we hit Sunken Stones? Dun dun DUN