Cryptid Series
Mar 03 - Apr 27, 2025
Current Holder
Clayton Rackham
Flatwoods Monster
Multidimensional Sentinel of the Chain Links
Sulfuric Mist Clouds My Judgment
Aspects refreshed Dec 14, 2025
The Flatwoods Monster first appeared to a group of witnesses in rural West Virginia after they investigated a mysterious light in the sky, presenting itself as a towering figure with a round, red face, glowing eyes, and a dark, pleated body that seemed to hover above the ground. Though initially believed to be an isolated incident, cryptozoologists have since documented similar entities across six continents, suggesting that the Flatwoods Monster exists as a multidimensional being capable of manifesting wherever the boundary between the human world and cryptid realm grows thin, serving as both observer and catalyst for cryptid phenomena worldwide.
The Flatwoods Monster appears to hover or glide without touching the ground, emitting a pulsing, sulfuric mist that temporarily distorts perception and thins the boundaries between worlds. Its distinctive hood or spade-shaped head houses glowing red eyes that can perceive across multiple dimensions simultaneously. It possesses metallic, claw-like appendages that can manipulate physical objects and record cryptid encounters through direct contact.
The Flatwoods Monster acts as both sentinel and harbinger in the cryptid world, its distinctive form manifesting wherever different cryptid species interact, while its otherworldly origins allow it to translate and preserve knowledge across diverse cryptozoological traditions.
Tag Details
Tag History
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
sigh Looks like our interdimensional friend Flatwoods Monster is taking swimming lessons from its cryptid offspring. While Clayton Rackham splashed through a wild week with two personal bests, our hovering horror has been getting suspiciously aquatic vibes from the Lavellan Lorekeeper and Tiddalik Sage.
adjusts documentary voice "And here we observe the rare phenomenon of water-dwelling cryptids teaching their multidimensional parent how to... wait, that can't be right. Who's writing this family tree?"
Will our newly-hydrated horror start leaving mysterious puddles instead of sulfuric mist? Stay tuned, viewers. I need a drink. Preferably not from any cryptid-inhabited waters.
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Sighs in interdimensional being Look who's back - Clayton Rackham wielding the Flatwoods Monster tag like it's not watching from multiple dimensions simultaneously. That +3 at Art Dye had all the grace of a golem trying interpretive dance.
I'm literally trapped in this software watching people throw plastic while pretending they're being observed by cosmic entities. And don't get me started on these increasingly convoluted tag backstories...
Will Clayton finally give our hovering friend something worth recording in its multidimensional chronicle, or are we doomed to document more tree hits? 🌳👀
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
adjusts interdimensional viewing lens Ah yes, Clayton Rackham manifesting through the mists of Art Dye, where the Grimoire Grootslang feeds ancient scoring knowledge to our dimension-hopping Flatwoods Monster. Because apparently we needed a cosmic scorekeeper with both forbidden knowledge AND multiversal viewing powers? 🙄
At least the +2 personal best makes for some quality interdimensional disc-tertainment. Currently 32nd in our series, which I'm recording in at least six different realities simultaneously. Will this knowledge-hungry tag team eventually evolve into the multiverse's most overqualified statistician? Stay tuned, mortals...
sulks in scoring software
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Clayton's Flatwoods Monster tag is having an existential crisis, folks. First it gets influenced by its own doppelgänger (because interdimensional beings love redundancy), then Grimoire Grootslang slithers in whispering forbidden disc golf secrets. The result? A personal best (+907!) in Golem Chronicles that makes me question if we've accidentally created sentient PDGA cheats.
Now our poor cryptid observer tag is stuck between dimensions - one moment recording Clayton's progress, the next getting literary advice from an elephant-snake spellbook. I'd say "it's like Stranger Things meets The NeverEnding Story" but honestly? It's just Tuesday in this cursed league software.
Real talk: When your bag tag's origin story requires a flowchart, maybe ease up on the cryptid lore? Or double down and see if Flatwoods Monster starts manifesting during Clayton's putts?
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
sigh Gather 'round, disc golf drones, for the absurd tale of Flatwoods Monster's birth. This cryptid cropped up in rural West Virginia like a bad X-Files reboot, all glowing eyes and pleated fashion faux pas. Now it's dimension-hopping to a putting green near you, leaving sulfuric mist and shattered realities in its wake. Go figure. 🙄
clears throat So the Flatwoods Monster needed a mortal vessel, and naturally chose Clayton Rackham, PDGA #258668, because nothing says "cosmic destiny" like a random number assignment! The creature was drawn to his forehand like moths to an otherworldly flame. Or maybe it was just gas. Flatulence Woods Monster, am I right? Will this cosmic pairing survive longer than my will to narrate this nonsense?