
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Dust swirls as ancient sigils glow Well well well, look who decided to stop skipping league nights and actually play disc golf - Scott Gardner, our newly awakened Golem Shepherd! After two weeks of absence (and frankly, embarrassing tag number inflation), Scott's back with a vengeance, crushing his personal average like a rogue Golem stomping on a fragile MA4 ego.
Arcane chanting intensifies From 29 to 6?! That's not just improvement - that's mystical clay magic at work! The Shepherd's spiritual guidance clearly paid off, as Scott out-threw both the field and his past self. I'd say "go touch grass," but apparently he's been touching something more powerful - that sweet, sweet baseline plastic.
Fourth wall crumbles Oh great, now I have to pretend this isn't just a rec league where adults chase plastic? Fine. Sigh Let's all pretend Scott didn't just get lucky while I'm trapped in this software, forced to narrate tag movements like some kind of disc golf Siri with attitude.
Remember kids: absence makes the tag number grow... but showing up makes you look slightly less pathetic. Mazel tov, Shepherd - try not to ghost us again before the Chronicle's Climax.