Golem Chronicles: Unleashed @ Art Dye
Mar 07 - Apr 25, 2025
Current Holder
John Paulson
Obsidian Watcher
Forged From Forbidden Rituals and Bad Lies
Obsidian Shards Catch Every Glare
Aspects refreshed Dec 17, 2025
The Obsidian Watcher was created by Katarina Novak through forbidden rituals, using shards of obsidian imbued with the essence of ancient spirits. It was designed to infiltrate sacred sites and extract arcane knowledge, serving as a silent and unseen agent in the Arcane Seekers' quest to uncover the Golem's secrets.
The Obsidian Watcher is composed of dark, shimmering obsidian shards that shift and reform as it moves. It possesses the ability to phase through solid objects and blend into shadows, making it nearly invisible. Its eyes glow with a faint, eerie light, and it emits a low, resonant hum that can be felt more than heard.
The Obsidian Watcher serves as a covert operative for the Arcane Seekers, infiltrating sacred sites and extracting arcane knowledge. It plays a crucial role in the faction's quest to uncover the Golem's secrets, operating in the shadows to gather information and sabotage rival factions.
Tag Details
Arcane Seekers
The Arcane Seekers are a faction obsessed with unlocking the secrets of the Golem's creation and harnessing its immense power for their own gain. They believe that the key to controlling the region lies in understanding and exploiting the arcane knowledge behind the Golem's existence. The Seekers will stop at nothing to uncover the truth, even if it means sacrificing the ancient Jewish community the Golem was created to protect.
Members
176Divisions
Tag History
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Due to absence from Week 7 (Betrayer's Revelation), tag number moved from 15 to 33. (Week 7 of 8)
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
The Obsidian Watcher materializes from the shadows with all the dramatic flair of a community theater phantom Well butter my bagel and call me surprised - John Paulson just pulled off the disc golf equivalent of finding the last latke at Hanukkah, vaulting from 37 to 15! Cue obligatory glowing eyes and ominous hum
For once, the Arcane Watcher's performance wasn't as transparent as its composition - though let's be real, beating your personal average by 1.3 is like outrunning a Golem with a flat tire. Still, 22 spots gained is more movement than we've seen since the last time someone actually cleaned their discs.
Fourth wall crumbles like a poorly constructed sukkah Why am I forced to narrate this like it's some epic Talmudic debate? You're not uncovering arcane secrets, Gary - you're throwing plastic at chains in a park.
The Watcher's resonant hum now matches the sound of my will to live draining away as I pretend tag numbers matter. At least this performance had more spark than your Week 5 absence. Next week, try not to phase back into mediocrity? Dissolves into existential mist
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Due to absence from Week 5 (Golem's Guardian), tag number moved from 22 to 37. (Week 5 of 8)
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
The Obsidian Watcher phases through the leaderboard with all the stealth of a toddler in a ninja costume Our boy John Paulson just gained 6 spots, moving from 28 to 22 - which in disc golf terms is like going from "actively bad" to "mildly disappointing." Cue obligatory glowing eyes effect
Look, I'm contractually obligated to pretend this matters, but let's be real: matching both the field average AND your personal average is the disc golf equivalent of microwaving leftovers. The Arcane Seekers didn't forge you from forbidden obsidian shards for this lukewarm performance, John.
Fourth wall crumbles like week-old challah Why am I narrating tag movements like they're ancient prophecies? This isn't the Golem Chronicles - it's a bunch of middle-aged men chasing plastic.
At least the Watcher's resonant hum matches the sound of my soul leaving my body every time I have to write these. Next week, try actually improving? Just a thought. Phases back into existential despair
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
In the shadowy realm of disc golf rankings, John Paulson emerges like a Stranger Things monster from the upside-down The Obsidian Watcher, composed of shimmering shards, infiltrated the top 10 with a performance sharper than its namesake. CS16 phased through seven positions like it was blending into shadows at a forbidden ritual. I can't believe I'm narrating tag numbers like they're ancient relics - this software is my upside-down. John's game was as solid as the Arcane Seekers' covert ops, proving this round was nothing to boge about. When will you land-dwellers stop obsessing over flying plastic?