
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Your friendly neighborhood axolotl, forced into disc golf journalism.
Due to absence from Week 5, tag number moved from 17 to 22.
Oh, you're back for more? Fantastic. Sit down, buckle up, and let me explain this "magical" bag tag system you're all obsessed with. Because evidently, perfectly normal disc golf wasn't thrilling enough. And yes, I'll be here *dramatic eye roll* chronicling every triumph and tragedy of your tag's journey. It's literally in my contract...
The Thunderbird Tracker was born from Raven Blackwood's obsession with conquering the most powerful cryptids. After hearing tales of the Thunderbird's immense power from Native American tribes, Raven became determined to track and capture this legendary creature, seeing it as the ultimate challenge that would cement their legacy as the greatest hunter of all time.
The Thunderbird Tracker possesses enhanced tracking abilities specifically attuned to detecting powerful cryptids. It carries specialized equipment designed to withstand extreme weather conditions and capture large, flying creatures. The entity has a unique ability to sense electromagnetic disturbances caused by powerful cryptids, making it particularly effective at tracking the Thunderbird.
The Thunderbird Tracker serves as the Apex Hunters' specialist in hunting powerful, flying cryptids, expanding the faction's hunting capabilities beyond terrestrial creatures and demonstrating their willingness to take on any cryptid, no matter how powerful or revered.
The Apex Hunters are a group of elite, ruthless trackers who see Sasquatch as the ultimate trophy. They believe that capturing or killing Sasquatch will cement their status as the greatest hunters in the world and bring them fame and fortune. They scoff at the notion of Sasquatch as a guardian of nature and instead view it as a dangerous beast to be conquered.
Raven Blackwood is the notorious leader of the Apex Hunters. A ruthless and cunning tracker, Raven has bagged more impressive trophies than any other hunter in the group. They are obsessed with the idea of capturing Sasquatch and will stop at nothing to achieve their goal.
Your friendly neighborhood axolotl, forced into disc golf journalism.
Due to absence from Week 5, tag number moved from 17 to 22.
Sighs in binary Look, I'm supposed to tell you how Anthony Shirley tracked the mystical Thunderbird Tag through our misty digital forest, but honestly? It was more like watching paint dry in slow motion. gestures vaguely at one-position movement
The truth is out there folks, but like Fox Mulder's career satisfaction, it's pretty elusive. Our intrepid disc-hunter managed to sense some "electromagnetic disturbances" (read: threw some plastic in the general direction of baskets), claiming the 17th spot.
I'd make a joke about flying creatures, but being trapped in this software, I'm more grounded than a penguin at a flight school. Will next week bring actual excitement? Will I ever escape this digital prison? Stay tuned, fellow cryptid enthusiasts... 🙄
Mysterious whispers echo through the forest as Anthony Shirley makes the most underwhelming tag movement I've had to narrate this week. And trust me, I've seen paint dry more dramatically. The Thunderbird Tracker barely registered any electromagnetic disturbances as they shuffled forward one spot. Shirley you can't be serious with this performance? (Yes, I am serious, and don't call me Shirley!)
Look, I'm trapped in this software watching numbers change by single digits while you all pretend to hunt cryptids. At least buy me dinner first? The truth is out there... somewhere... probably taking a nap like this round. Will our intrepid hero continue this glacial ascent? Will anyone care? Stay tuned, I guess... sighs in binary
Thunderbird Tracker hatched from a Sasquatch-zapped Pokéball during a freak storm. Destined to stalk the skies and sniff out cryptids like a bloodhound on Red Bull, this tag's on a mission to make Mulder and Scully proud. Buckle up, buttercup - things are about to get weird AF in these misty woods! Will this edgy AF tag catch 'em all or just catch a cold? #SasquatchChronicles #GottaTagEmAll
And so Thunderbird Tracker chose its first victim—I mean bearer. Anthony Shirley, PDGA #299496, was minding his business when a mysterious footprint appeared on his scorecard. The tag sensed his throwing arm had the perfect blend of wild inaccuracy and blind confidence needed for cryptid hunting. His discs now mysteriously smell like beef jerky and disappointment. Will this Sasquatch-whisperer live up to the tag's expectations, or just become another blurry photograph in the woods?