Dustin Hanson: #2 Whispering Contortionist

Dustin Hanson

Dustin Hanson

PDGA Rating 914
Division MP40
Events Played 13
2
Dustin Hanson
Whispering Contortionist
Background

ElevateUT Freak Show Series

Jan 25 - Mar 01, 2025
#2 Whispering Contortionist
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So, You Want to Know About These Tags?
Flippy
*aggressively taps microphone while glaring at camera*

Oh, you're back for more? Fantastic. Sit down, buckle up, and let me explain this "magical" bag tag system you're all obsessed with. Because evidently, perfectly normal disc golf wasn't thrilling enough. And yes, I'll be here *dramatic eye roll* chronicling every triumph and tragedy of your tag's journey. It's literally in my contract...

  1. 1
    The Digital Dance
    First things first - you'll be assigned a virtual tag number that changes based on your performance. Think of it as your ranking in this unnecessarily elaborate performance tracking system. *mutters under breath* As if regular scoring wasn't complicated enough...
  2. 2
    The Weekly Number Shuffle
    Every event, we rank players by their scores within their pool. Shoot the lowest score? Congratulations, your tag number becomes #1. *sarcastically waves tiny flag* Shoot the highest? Well... let's just say your number will reflect your 'journey of growth' or whatever motivational nonsense marketing wants me to say.
  3. 3
    Ties & Tag Defense
    *adjusts glasses while scrutinizing ancient code scrolls* When players tie - because apparently shooting the same score isn't dramatic enough - we look at their current tag numbers. The player with the lower number wins the tie. So if #4 and #8 tie, #4 stays ahead. Yes, the rich get richer. No, I don't make these rules. I just have to narrate them with increasingly dramatic flair... *stares directly into camera*
  4. 4
    Missed Events
    Skip an event? Your tag number gets shuffled to the bottom of the active players, but at least you maintain your relative order among the other no-shows. *flips through documentation* Though why anyone would care about their ranking in the 'didn't show up' category is beyond me...
  5. 5
    Getting Your Physical Tag
    *adjusts marketing hat with visible discomfort* During registration, you can purchase a high-quality acrylic bag tag with your name on it. At season's end, it'll display your final earned number - your 'badge of honor' or 'mark of shame,' depending on how well you played. They'll deliver it to your local disc golf shop. *straightens marketing materials* Just... just buy one, okay? I have quotas to meet.
  6. 6
    Your Personal Chronicler
    *sighs heavily while opening ornate ledger* And yes, I'll be here, documenting every rise and fall of your tag number with the dramatic flair of a fantasy novelist who got lost and ended up at a disc golf course. Your tag's weekly performance will be transformed into an epic saga whether you want it to be or not. It's... it's just what we do now. *dies inside a little more*
*shuffles papers while muttering about career choices*

There you have it, mortals. Track your digital tag's weekly journey, order your physical memento during registration (*whispers* please, these sales quotas are killing me), and brace yourself for weekly doses of my reluctant storytelling. I'll be at my desk, questioning my life choices while transforming your disc golf scores into epic tales of triumph and tragedy... because somehow that's become my job description.

Whispering Contortionist

#2

Origin Story

The Whispering Contortionist was once a normal performer in a small traveling circus, known for their incredible flexibility and grace. However, after a fateful encounter with a shadowy figure during a performance in a forgotten town, they gained the ability to whisper secrets and prophecies while contorting their body in impossible ways. This transformation drew the attention of Dr. Arcanus, who quickly recruited them into The Peculiar Pavilion.

Properties

The Whispering Contortionist possesses an unnaturally flexible body, capable of bending and twisting in ways that defy human anatomy. Their whispers carry an eerie, almost hypnotic quality, often revealing hidden truths or unsettling prophecies. They have a heightened sense of awareness, allowing them to sense the emotions and intentions of those around them. Their movements are fluid and almost otherworldly, adding to their mysterious aura.

Role

The Whispering Contortionist serves as both a performer and a seer within The Peculiar Pavilion. Their acts are a blend of physical artistry and eerie prophecy, captivating and unsettling the audience in equal measure. They also play a crucial role in uncovering secrets and hidden truths backstage, using their whispers to reveal the intentions of others.

Tag Details

League ElevateUT Freak Show Series
Pool The Peculiar Pavilion

Tag History

Dustin Hanson
Dustin Hanson
Week 1
one month ago
Origin Story