Tardy Teepad

Adjusts glasses and glances at the mysteriously perfect December weather data. Well, well—looks like Mother Nature decided to play along with Principal Morrison's little administrative theater. 🎭

The Bell Rang, Nobody Listened 📖

Week 2 of Fast Times at Creekside High brought "Tardy Teepad" to the Walter Fredrick Morrison Memorial course on December 14th, where 19 players defied Principal Morrison's truancy crackdown under suspiciously perfect conditions—average 50.6°F with barely a whisper of wind at 1.9 mph. The headline rebellion: Malachi Vazquez torched his personal best with a -12 (1016-rated) masterpiece that dethroned Nicholas Scott's Week 1 dominance, while Michuel Palfy authored a wire-to-wire bogey-free clinic in the Challengers division. The $731 Super Ace pot on hole 4 remains statistically due but narratively patient—apparently even the chains respect detention hall.

The Honor Roll Got Rewritten

Malachi Vazquez rewrote the RPA curriculum with a personal-record -12 that climbed him from 2nd to 1st, his back nine eight strokes better than the front as he collected eight birdies from holes 11-18, including sole conversions on holes 9 and 17. Jared Lang (-11, 1002-rated, bogey-free) held the final cash spot after leading through hole 6, his four-hole hot streak (5-8) and clean back nine keeping him in contention until Malachi's late surge on hole 16. Brian Hansen (-7, 948-rated, bogey-free) finished just outside the money after a three-stroke back-nine improvement climbed him from 4th to 3rd, while Houston Turner (-6, 934-rated) caught fire late with a four-stroke improvement that moved him from 6th to 4th—41 points above his rating. Meanwhile, Nicholas Scott—last week's "unassailable" champion—crashed from -11 (1010-rated, bogey-free) to -1 (866-rated), a 144-rating-point freefall that lasted exactly one week. The measuring stick became the target, and the pressure is very real now. 🔥

First Period, Last Standing

Michuel Palfy dominated RAE from first throw to final putt, going wire-to-wire with a bogey-free -9 (975-rated) that finished 83 points above his 892 rating. He clinched the outright win with a birdie on 18, adding sole conversions on holes 3 and 6 to his clean sheet. Brett Lewis (-6, 934-rated) locked down the final cash spot 47 points above rating, his clean front nine and four-hole hot streak (13-16) including the sole birdie on hole 15, which played +1.5 average and bit most players back. Bryan Cook (-3, 893-rated) finished just outside the money after a clean back nine moved him into 3rd after hole 15. Not everyone survived the academic pressure: Will Horner (854 rated) faded from a share of the lead after hole 1 to 11th place at +9 (730-rated)—124 points below rating—while Dijon Alston (870 rated) also struggled with +7 (757-rated), 113 points below rating.

The Seating Chart Kept Changing

RAF turned into musical chairs with six lead changes as Michael Cook, Eric Read, and Jordan Lucero traded positions like they were passing notes in detention. Michael Cook (+3, 811-rated) ultimately claimed round honors despite finishing 35 points below his 846 rating, his clean front nine (8-hole par train from holes 1-8) holding off the chaos. Eric Read and Michael tied after hole 1, Michael took the lead after hole 3, Eric reclaimed it after hole 10, Jordan seized it after hole 12, then Michael reclaimed it after hole 14 for the final time. Eric Read and Jordan Lucero both finished +4 (798-rated), their seating assignments constantly shuffling throughout the round. 📚

Independent Study, Party of One

Trey Guernsey (-1, 866-rated) posted the sole round in RAD, his three-hole hot streak (5-7) including the sole birdie on hole 2, which played +0.0 average for the Vanguard division. A quiet, workmanlike round in a division of one—sometimes the best education happens when you're the only student in class.

The Curve Got Destroyed

Five players absolutely demolished the rating curve, shooting 40+ points above their numbers: Michuel Palfy (+83), Malachi Vazquez (+55), Brett Lewis (+47), Jared Lang (+47), and Houston Turner (+41). Three players turned in bogey-free masterpieces—Michuel, Jared, and Brian Hansen—proving that sometimes the homework actually pays off. The course fought back on specific holes: hole 15 (281ft, par 3) played +1.5 average in Challengers, and hole 18 (349ft, par 3) played +0.6 average, though Bryan Cook and Michuel Palfy bucked the trend with closing birdies. Notable recovery work from Matt Berman, who bounced back from a double on hole 8 with a birdie on hole 9, then played two-under across the next three holes. 📈

The Measuring Stick Became the Target

The Vanguard Keeper (#1) has found its proper throne, with Malachi Vazquez climbing from tag #3 to #1 after his personal-best -12 performance. The tag's lore speaks of "setting the competitive standard that transforms scattered rebels into a unified force"—and now it sits exactly where it belongs, no longer languishing in the middle ranks. This Pre-Raphaelite masterpiece shows a disc golfer in flowing 80s flannel framed by creek-side flora, disc held like a sacred artifact against deep forest green gradients. As the AI historian noted with delicious irony: "The measuring stick is now the target. Pressure's very real now, isn't it?" Nicholas Scott, last week's holder, surrendered both the position and 144 rating points—proof that even the most carefully crafted narrative can't protect you from the chains' honest judgment.

Lunch Money Changed Hands 💰

Three skins cards saw $126 change hands among 11 players, with Malachi Vazquez dominating the 1:40 PM card for 18 skins worth $54 against Brian Hansen and Nicholas Scott—opening on hole 1 with a birdie, surviving a 7-hole push, then closing with birdies on 17 and 18. Jared Lang collected 15 skins for $37.50 on the 12:20 PM card, his 11 birdies claiming 8 skins ($20) alone, while Houston Turner banked 13 skins for $19.50, including an 8-skin carryover scoop on hole 15. The 12:20 PM card provided the most action: Michuel opened on hole 3 with a birdie for 3 skins, then Jared's birdie on hole 7 grabbed 4 skins after a 3-hole push. Want to add stakes to your next round? Learn how to set up skins.

The Crackdown Created Converts

Episode 2's "Tardy Teepad" promised bonds forming in the urgency of stolen time—and 19 Creek-rats answered the call despite Principal Morrison's truancy crackdown, four more than Week 1's rebellion. The honor-roll kid made their first appearance, initially scandalized, then curious, then hooked—much like the late surges from Houston Turner or Michuel Palfy's wire-to-wire dominance. The Creekside Course Fund collected $19.90 this week ($19 automatic at $1/player, plus $0.90 in extras), pushing the balance to $1,132.66—past the $1,000 goal. Recent improvements include the new OB stakes between holes 7/8, funded by earlier contributions.

Second Period Dismissed

Two weeks down, seven to go before the final exam. Malachi Vazquez holds both the Vanguard Keeper and the season's hottest hand, while Nicholas Scott's Week 1 dominance has become a cautionary tale about statistical regression. The $731 Super Ace pot grows more legendary by the week, statistically due but patiently waiting for its narrative moment. Next up: Week 3's "Canal Brotherhood"—when the social barriers finally dissolve and a rainstorm forces different groups into the guru's van, emerging with a shared Creek-rat identity. The steamy, cramped interior awaits. Will you be inside when the lightning strikes? ⛈️