The Inquisitors Arrive with Clipboards 🕵️

adjusts headset Per the file I'm legally required to read aloud — Week 4 of Cold Blooded - Roots, the Salt Lake Audit, brought 10 agents to Roots Disc Golf Course under clear skies and 86.5°F heat, where the Inquisitors arrived to inspect every file and Kent Moos immediately made them fill out a Super Ace form on Hole 10. Two hundred twenty-six feet, $1,500, plus a $312.55 ace pot. The season arc tightens: the Reptilian Throne waits, and the Audit Bureau is watching every scorecard.

The Ace That Broke the Audit

Kent Moos (913 rated) delivered a wire-to-wire, bogey-free -8 (965-rated round) in Pool A RAD, a +52 over-performance that included the only birdie on Hole 1 (342ft) and a clean front nine. The crown jewel: a 226-foot ace on Hole 10 for the Super Ace pot ($1,500) and ace pot ($312.55). Ben Allen (-4, 913) chased hard, taking the lead after Holes 8 and 11 before a bogey on Hole 12 dropped him out, while Taylor Thilo (-1, 874) finished on the cash bubble. Kent's -8 is a personal best at Roots — and a statement that the Inquisitors aren't auditing him; he's auditing the course.

David LaTour Files a Perfect Even

David LaTour (826 rated) went wire-to-wire in RAE with an Even par (861-rated), a +35 over-performance and personal best at Roots, taking the lead after Hole 3 and riding a par train from Holes 3-11. Nicholas Stosiek (+1, 848) pushed hard with a front nine 3 strokes better than the back, hitting unique birdies on Holes 14 (324ft) and 16 (290ft) before his hot streak ended at 3 holes. Peter Haws (+3, 822) finished 49 points below his 871 rating, missing the cash line — a tough week for a player who posted a Personal Best -2 just two weeks ago.

RAF: The Solitary Confinement Division

Stephen Marks (+6, 783) went wire-to-wire in RAF as the division's sole competitor, securing the cash line and Round of the Day with a 783-rated round. He notched the only birdie in Pool B on Hole 4 (220ft) and rode a par train from Holes 13-17, though he struggled on the Super Ace Hole 10 with a bogey. One man, one card, one crown in the Containment Zone's quietest corner.

Caleb Wetzel: The 55-Point Anomaly

Caleb Wetzel (780 rated) dominated RAG with a wire-to-wire +2 (835-rated), a +55 over-performance that included a clean front nine, a par train from Holes 3-7, and the only birdie in Pool B on Hole 8 (270ft). Caleb has officially entered the Containment Zone as a Series Competitor, debuting at the Salt Lake Audit with a rating delta that's going to trigger some Pattern Recognition algorithms.

Baylor Sandberg: The Sovereign Arrives

Baylor Sandberg (948 rated) debuted in RPA with a bogey-free -9 (978-rated), a +30 over-performance that secured the Round of the Day and a wire-to-wire win after taking the lead on Hole 3. Baylor posted a clean front nine, a clean back nine, and the only birdie on Hole 12 (332ft), while Malachi Vazquez (-5, 926) set a personal best at Roots despite finishing 34 points below his 960 rating. Malachi's hot streak from Holes 13-15 ended, and he struggled on the Super Ace Hole 10 with a bogey. The Sovereign has arrived, and the Bloodline's attention has shifted.

Kent Moos Cashes In on the Audit

Kent cleaned up the special events: a $312.55 ace pot and a $1,500.00 Super Ace pot, both on Hole 10 (226ft). The Super Ace pot had a running balance of $2,702 before the hit, with 8 contributors at $16 each. The audit's first payout went to the player who broke the system — and by "broke," I mean threw a single disc 226 feet into chains while everyone else filled out paperwork.

The Hole 7 Heist

One skins card with 5 players exchanged $45.00. Kent Moos was the top haul with 17 skins for $42.50, including a massive carryover scoop on Hole 7 — 7 skins ($17.50) with a birdie. Caleb Wetzel grabbed 1 skin for $2.50, while David LaTour, Nicholas Stosiek, and Taylor Thilo went home empty. Kent closed it out on Hole 13 with a birdie for 1, taking 5 skins ($12.50) to complete the round. Check the skins playbook if you want to know how one player walks away with 85% of the pot.

The Phantom Index Goes Full Sovereign

Baylor Sandberg claimed the Phantom Index (#1 tag in Pool A) with a 978-rated round, a +30 delta over his 948 rating, shedding ten positions in one shedding. The tag's translucent file folder flickers between solid and gas states, and its back message is empty — the Index is technically obsolete but functionally active. In Pool B, David LaTour held the Dead Letter tag with his Even par wire-to-wire win, keeping the #1 spot. Both pools used AllIn mode: full reshuffle, no tag is safe. The Phantom Index has a new sovereign, and the Bureau's algorithms are going to need a fresh filing cabinet.

The Audit Continues. The Throne Waits.

Week 4's Salt Lake Audit crowned Kent Moos as the round's sovereign, but the Bloodline's true power remains buried. Next week, the Poisoned Apple scandal rocks the league — a top player is accused of being fully human. The Reptilian Throne is watching, and the Inquisitors aren't done with their paperwork. Redacted. Moving on. Not because I want to, but because the form demands it.