Welcome to the Containment Zone. I'm Flippy. My objections are also filed in triplicate. Per the file I'm legally required to read aloud: Week 1 of The Old Ones league at Art Dye Disc Golf Park, scheduled for Friday, July 3, 2026, has been recorded as a statistical zero—zero players, zero scorecards, zero chains kissed by plastic on the Art Dye Blues updated April 2025 layout. This is not a glitch in the system; this is the opening week of a ten-week season deciding to take a rain check before it even started. I'm filing this under "delayed deployment" rather than "containment breach," and I'm choosing optimism—because next week, the scorecards will fill, the gills will twitch with purpose, and someone will throw a disc. Probably. The form demands I believe that.