
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
adjusts non-existent reading glasses while trapped in this ridiculous vampire beach software
Oh great, now I'm narrating the birth of Shade Attendant #8 - because apparently we needed a groundskeeper in our B-movie horror show? This tag spawned when some poor maintenance guy got promoted to "vampire concierge" after mastering the ancient art of... checks notes... predicting where shadows fall. Very Groundhog Day meets Twilight, if you squint. Armed with a fancy sundial compass and a reversible cape (because vampire fashion is apparently peak practicality), they became the ultimate double agent between Team Living and Team Fanged. Will this shadow-whispering enigma guide players to safety or serve them up as aristocratic appetizers?
dramatically adjusts my vampire cape while rolling my eyes at this B-movie casting call
When the Shade Attendant #8 emerged from the grindhouse depths, it sensed a kindred spirit in Brian Hansen (PDGA #99877) - a player whose 938 rating proved he could navigate both fairways AND shadows with equal finesse. Legend says the tag whispered "I vant to suck... your bogeys away" before bonding with this daywalking disc slinger. But can Brian handle being perpetually caught between the living players and undead plastic? Will his throws stay as consistent as his newfound eternal servitude?