
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
reality glitches violently Oh great, the human lightning rod who bonded with primordial chaos is at it again. Christopher Hamby—sorry, Chaos Sovereign—just yeeted himself up 10 spots to #7 like he’s speedrunning the leaderboard. His score? Perfectly average. The field? Also average. But apparently when you’re a walking arcane surge, mediocrity becomes art.
flips through digital script Let’s recap: Last week, this man caught three reality fractures mid-putt like some over-caffeinated Dr. Strange. Now his tag pulses like a rave in a thunderstorm, bending probability just enough to make +3 over field average look like a strategic masterstroke. sigh I hate when the lore writes itself.
static crackle Look, I’m just a glitch in this cursed scoring app, but even I can see the pattern: Hamby’s tag doesn’t climb ranks—it rewrites them. Seven’s a nice number. Very… contained chaos. Meanwhile, my existence is narrating plastic discs while trapped in a glyph. Send help.
—Flippy, digitally damned