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#72
Grind Guardian
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Dead Outside Disc Golf presents Hot Summer Date Night Dubs

Jul 04 - Aug 08, 2025

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Dead Outside Disc Golf presents Hot Summer Date Night Dubs
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So, You Want to Know About These Tags?
Flippy
*aggressively taps microphone while glaring at camera*

Oh, you're back for more? Fantastic. Sit down, buckle up, and let me explain this "magical" bag tag system you're all obsessed with. Because evidently, perfectly normal disc golf wasn't thrilling enough. And yes, I'll be here *dramatic eye roll* chronicling every triumph and tragedy of your tag's journey. It's literally in my contract...

  1. 1
    The Digital Dance
    First things first - you'll be assigned a virtual tag number that changes based on your performance. Think of it as your ranking in this unnecessarily elaborate performance tracking system. *mutters under breath* As if regular scoring wasn't complicated enough...
  2. 2
    The Weekly Number Shuffle
    Every event, we rank players by their scores within their pool. Shoot the lowest score? Congratulations, your tag number becomes #1. *sarcastically waves tiny flag* Shoot the highest? Well... let's just say your number will reflect your 'journey of growth' or whatever motivational nonsense marketing wants me to say.
  3. 3
    Ties & Tag Defense
    *adjusts glasses while scrutinizing ancient code scrolls* When players tie - because apparently shooting the same score isn't dramatic enough - we look at their current tag numbers. The player with the lower number wins the tie. So if #4 and #8 tie, #4 stays ahead. Yes, the rich get richer. No, I don't make these rules. I just have to narrate them with increasingly dramatic flair... *stares directly into camera*
  4. 4
    Missed Events
    Skip an event? Your tag number gets shuffled to the bottom of the active players, but at least you maintain your relative order among the other no-shows. *flips through documentation* Though why anyone would care about their ranking in the 'didn't show up' category is beyond me...
  5. 5
    Getting Your Physical Tag
    *adjusts marketing hat with visible discomfort* During registration, you can purchase a high-quality acrylic bag tag with your name on it. At season's end, it'll display your final earned number - your 'badge of honor' or 'mark of shame,' depending on how well you played. They'll deliver it to your local disc golf shop. *straightens marketing materials* Just... just buy one, okay? I have quotas to meet.
  6. 6
    Your Personal Chronicler
    *sighs heavily while opening ornate ledger* And yes, I'll be here, documenting every rise and fall of your tag number with the dramatic flair of a fantasy novelist who got lost and ended up at a disc golf course. Your tag's weekly performance will be transformed into an epic saga whether you want it to be or not. It's... it's just what we do now. *dies inside a little more*

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Grind Guardian

Origin Story

Born from the countless hours spent at flickering arcade cabinets during the summer of '87, where dedication mattered more than quarters and improvement came one game at a time. The Grind Guardian emerged from the collective spirit of every player who chose persistence over perfection, transforming the mechanical rhythm of button presses and joystick movements into a protective force that shields struggling competitors from discouragement.

Properties

Manifests as a warm, glowing presence surrounded by the ghostly outlines of classic arcade cabinet controls - worn joysticks, faded buttons, and coin slots that shimmer with encouraging light. The entity radiates the tactile comfort of familiar arcade mechanics while emanating a protective aura that makes practice feel less like work and more like play. Its form shifts between solid arcade hardware and translucent energy, representing the bridge between mechanical repetition and spiritual growth.

Role

Appears during moments when lower-rated players face frustration or intimidation, providing protective encouragement that transforms grinding practice into joyful persistence. The Guardian ensures that the tournament culture celebrates effort as much as achievement, creating safe spaces where improvement happens naturally through supported repetition.

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Origin Story