Jul 04 - Aug 08, 2025
Oh, you're back for more? Fantastic. Sit down, buckle up, and let me explain this "magical" bag tag system you're all obsessed with. Because evidently, perfectly normal disc golf wasn't thrilling enough. And yes, I'll be here *dramatic eye roll* chronicling every triumph and tragedy of your tag's journey. It's literally in my contract...
Born from the intersection of championship excellence and exclusive romantic sophistication during the legendary summer of '87, Paradise Patrician emerged as the ultimate authority figure of the sunset tournament scene. This entity materialized when the most elite competitors realized that true mastery required not just athletic dominance, but the aristocratic bearing to transform any venue into their personal romantic estate.
Paradise Patrician possesses the supernatural ability to transform tournament venues into exclusive romantic paradises that reflect the competitor's elite status and sophisticated taste. Its presence elevates both competitive standards and romantic expectations, creating an atmosphere where only the most accomplished players can maintain their composure and excel. The entity radiates an aura of aristocratic authority that inspires higher-rated players to achieve their most refined performances while commanding respect from all tournament participants.
Paradise Patrician establishes and maintains the exclusive standards of the championship's most prestigious moments, appearing when elite players need to demonstrate supreme authority over both competitive excellence and romantic sophistication. It serves as the ultimate arbiter of what constitutes true championship nobility in the sunset romance hierarchy.
adjusts leg warmers while typing Look, Tag 67 just manifested during a champagne toast at the '87 Members Only jacket convention. Like Gatsby but with more neon and better hair gel. Now I'm stuck narrating its "aristocratic essence" while it judges everyone's putting form. This timeline is totally bogus, dudes.