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Cabaret Captain
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Dead Outside Disc Golf presents Hot Summer Date Night Dubs

Jul 04 - Aug 08, 2025

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Dead Outside Disc Golf presents Hot Summer Date Night Dubs
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So, You Want to Know About These Tags?
Flippy
*aggressively taps microphone while glaring at camera*

Oh, you're back for more? Fantastic. Sit down, buckle up, and let me explain this "magical" bag tag system you're all obsessed with. Because evidently, perfectly normal disc golf wasn't thrilling enough. And yes, I'll be here *dramatic eye roll* chronicling every triumph and tragedy of your tag's journey. It's literally in my contract...

  1. 1
    The Digital Dance
    First things first - you'll be assigned a virtual tag number that changes based on your performance. Think of it as your ranking in this unnecessarily elaborate performance tracking system. *mutters under breath* As if regular scoring wasn't complicated enough...
  2. 2
    The Weekly Number Shuffle
    Every event, we rank players by their scores within their pool. Shoot the lowest score? Congratulations, your tag number becomes #1. *sarcastically waves tiny flag* Shoot the highest? Well... let's just say your number will reflect your 'journey of growth' or whatever motivational nonsense marketing wants me to say.
  3. 3
    Ties & Tag Defense
    *adjusts glasses while scrutinizing ancient code scrolls* When players tie - because apparently shooting the same score isn't dramatic enough - we look at their current tag numbers. The player with the lower number wins the tie. So if #4 and #8 tie, #4 stays ahead. Yes, the rich get richer. No, I don't make these rules. I just have to narrate them with increasingly dramatic flair... *stares directly into camera*
  4. 4
    Missed Events
    Skip an event? Your tag number gets shuffled to the bottom of the active players, but at least you maintain your relative order among the other no-shows. *flips through documentation* Though why anyone would care about their ranking in the 'didn't show up' category is beyond me...
  5. 5
    Getting Your Physical Tag
    *adjusts marketing hat with visible discomfort* During registration, you can purchase a high-quality acrylic bag tag with your name on it. At season's end, it'll display your final earned number - your 'badge of honor' or 'mark of shame,' depending on how well you played. They'll deliver it to your local disc golf shop. *straightens marketing materials* Just... just buy one, okay? I have quotas to meet.
  6. 6
    Your Personal Chronicler
    *sighs heavily while opening ornate ledger* And yes, I'll be here, documenting every rise and fall of your tag number with the dramatic flair of a fantasy novelist who got lost and ended up at a disc golf course. Your tag's weekly performance will be transformed into an epic saga whether you want it to be or not. It's... it's just what we do now. *dies inside a little more*
*shuffles papers while muttering about career choices*

There you have it, mortals. Track your digital tag's weekly journey, order your physical memento during registration (*whispers* please, these sales quotas are killing me), and brace yourself for weekly doses of my reluctant storytelling. I'll be at my desk, questioning my life choices while transforming your disc golf scores into epic tales of triumph and tragedy... because somehow that's become my job description.

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Cabaret Captain

Origin Story

Emerged from the legendary Sunset Strip Cabaret, the most exclusive beachside entertainment venue of summer '87, where only the most skilled performers could simultaneously command the stage and dominate the adjacent championship disc golf course. Born from the fusion of neon-lit romance and competitive excellence, this entity first appeared when the venue's star performer achieved a perfect round while serenading three different couples during a single magical evening.

Properties

Manifests as a sophisticated blend of rich burgundy velvet and chrome accents, with subtle neon pink piping that pulses in rhythm with nearby romantic energy. The surface features an intricate pattern of intertwined musical notes and disc flight paths, while tiny embedded lights create the illusion of a miniature stage complete with spotlights that activate during moments of exceptional performance. When held by elite players, it emanates the faint sound of smooth jazz mixed with the whisper of perfect disc releases.

Role

Transforms tournament venues into sophisticated entertainment experiences, appearing when elite competitors must demonstrate both technical mastery and the charismatic leadership needed to elevate entire events into unforgettable romantic spectacles. Commands respect through the fusion of athletic excellence and entertainment artistry that defines championship-level performance.

Tag Details

League Dead Outside Disc Golf presents Hot Summer Date Night Dubs
Pool Sunset Serenaders

Tag History

Origin Story
one month ago