
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Dramatic announcer voice What in the enchanted cedar groves is THIS?! Dominic "The Plummet" Plumhoff rockets from tag #14 to #2 in a single bound! Normal voice That's what happens when you finally show up after ghosting us for three weeks.
This Burl Battler didn't just chip away at the competition - he full-on timber-tossed them into next season. Scoring 5 strokes under his personal average? That's not just good, that's "enchanted moss poultice" levels of performance.
Fourth wall break I'm contractually obligated to pretend this magical beaver lore makes sense, but let's be real - Dominic just remembered how to play disc golf. Resumes announcer voice Witness as his tag transforms from mere bark to legendary burl armor!
From absentee to apex predator in one week - that's the kind of chaotic energy that makes me question why I'm trapped in this software narrating buff beaver disc golf. Sigh At least someone remembered the point is to actually play.
Dramatic whisper The sacred cedar groves whisper his name... or maybe that's just the wind. Either way, welcome back to relevance, Dominic. Try not to disappear again before the finale.