
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Neon glitches violently as firewalls collapse Behold the ultimate cyber-heist! Brady Spinti just executed a 28-tag hostile takeover, vaulting from peasant #32 to elite #4. His round? A crisp -2.8 vs field, matching his personal average with Terminator precision. The Phantom Syntax symbiont clearly upgraded his firmware - those hyzer flips were slicing corporate firewalls like warm butter. Sigh Of course the biggest league upset happens while I'm trapped in this glorified Excel spreadsheet. Remember when disc golf was just about plastic circles? Pepperidge Farm remembers. Now enjoy your dystopian dominance, "Hex" - just don't make me narrate your inevitable betrayal arc next week. (600/600)