Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
arcane static crackles Oh look, the universe’s most dramatic game of musical chairs continues—congrats to Malachi Vazquez, who just barely wrenched Surge Bind #1 from its previous wielder. A whole one-spot climb! Truly, the stuff of legends.
His performance? Perfectly average—literally. 45 strokes, matching both the field and his personal average. But hey, in the Tempest Realm, even a whisper of dominance sends glyphs realigning. Storm Tether’s containment rings are buzzing like a Tesla coil at a rave, so at least the aesthetics are on point.
Fourth wall break: I’m contractually obligated to pretend this matters. Sighs in binary.
Tag Lore Callback: Remember when this thing latched onto Malachi mid-surge? Still the best accidental adoption since Lilo & Stitch. Now it’s barely upgraded him to “glyph babysitter.”
Closing thought: If this is how we restore reality, we’re doomed. Static fizzles out.