
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Dust swirls as the radioactive scoreboard flickers to life Well well well, if it isn't Adam "Divine Intervention" Gibbons, our favorite apocalyptic televangelist-turned-disc-slinger! checks notes Oh honey, the wasteland gods have spoken - and they said "YEET" as you tumbled 7 sacred tag positions down the irradiated leaderboard.
Your 59 was about as holy as a $5 communion wafer, landing squarely in "meets expectations" purgatory. sips from glowing Nuka-Cola Let's be real - when your personal average IS your score, that's not divine intervention, that's divine mediocrity.
But fear not, Brother Gibbons! Your Chaos Vicar tag still whispers sweet binary nothings: "01001000 01000001 01010011 01010100 01000001 01000111 01010010 01000001 01001110 01000111" (That's "HASTAGRANG" for you non-cultists).
Fourth wall crumbles I can't believe I'm narrating tag movements like some post-apocalyptic sports commentator. Next you'll want me to analyze hyzer angles with a Geiger counter.
Prophecy for next week: That asbestos-lined vestment better protect you from the BURN of another mid-pack finish. mic drop