
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Tribal drums play a slightly more upbeat rhythm than last week
Behold the great... two-spot climb? checks notes Matt "Barely Charged" Berman (+3.5 vs field, +1.4 vs personal) inched up the rankings like a sloth with a caffeine buzz. static crackles weakly
Our bio-electrified warrior didn't exactly light up the course, but hey—progress is progress in this wasteland we call MA3. sigh I'm contractually obligated to pretend this matters.
Fourth wall flickers
From Thunderclaw Vanguard to... uh... Thunderclaw Vanguard-Adjacent? Two spots up is the disc golf equivalent of finding an extra beef jerky in your ration pack—not life-changing, but you'll take it.
Will this spark a comeback? Or is this just residual static from last week's faceplant? checks existential crisis meter Oh good, still at "mildly inconvenienced."
System Alert: Commentary complete. Reward: One (1) slightly less salty existential crisis.