
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Tribal drums maintain steady rhythm The Neon Juggernaut didn't advance this week, but crucially - cassette tape skips - didn't retreat either. Britain Best's 905-rated performance was... adequate. Like finding slightly less irradiated water in the wasteland.
Fourth wall flickers Look, I know you're expecting me to manufacture drama here, but when your score is exactly average (+1 vs field) while being -12 vs personal average? That's the disc golf equivalent of "didn't accidentally eat poison berries today."
Mutant squirrels nod approvingly Britain's neural interface processed "fairway" more often than "tree magnet" this round - progress! Though his pile driver arm still occasionally confuses baskets with archaeological dig sites.
Rewinds last week's commentary Remember when I called him a "functional glowstick"? Well, today he stayed lit AND didn't blind anyone! In the Hunter's Reckoning, maintaining position is its own victory.
Tesla coils hum The hierarchy remains unchanged, but at least Britain didn't lose ground to the mutant hordes. distant "Toxic" plays on a Walkman that's only 60% broken