
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Tribal drums intensify Behold, the Savage Awakening begins! Britain Best - our favorite Vibram-soled warrior - just yeeted himself up 3 spots in the tribal hierarchy. Sigh Yes, I'm contractually obligated to pretend these plastic numbers matter.
The Neon Juggernaut's circuits hum with approval as Britain lands exactly on field average - the disc golf equivalent of microwaving a Hot Pocket perfectly. "Bye Bye Bye" to tag #7, hello #4! Though let's be real - this early in the season, rankings have all the stability of a putter in a hurricane.
Fourth wall shatters Look, I know you're just here for the schadenfreude when someone inevitably shanks into mutant raccoon territory. But Britain's 941-rated round suggests his fusion core might actually be functional this season.
Remember kids: In the Thunderdome of tag challenges, the first rule is we pretend this isn't absurd. Now excuse me while I sync my commentary to the cursed *NSYNC cassette again. muffled "It's Gonna Be Me" plays