
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
David Jones's Wandering Wampus (#23) has been updated based on their recent performance in the series.
Oh, you're back for more? Fantastic. Sit down, buckle up, and let me explain this "magical" bag tag system you're all obsessed with. Because evidently, perfectly normal disc golf wasn't thrilling enough. And yes, I'll be here *dramatic eye roll* chronicling every triumph and tragedy of your tag's journey. It's literally in my contract...
A Cherokee witch's curse transformed a mountain lion into the first Wampus, granting it eternal life and the ability to walk between worlds.
Glowing yellow eyes that see through dimensional veils, a mournful cry that echoes across leagues, and claws that leave no physical mark but psychic impressions.
Keeper of forgotten cryptid pathways that connect disparate cryptid habitats.
David Jones's Wandering Wampus (#23) has been updated based on their recent performance in the series.
The Wandering Wampus blinked its glowing eyes across dimensions this week, watching David Jones (+8 at Wildwood Whispers) like a disappointed spirit animal. Its "co-parent" Tsuchinoko Keeper whispered Japanese forest remedies, but let’s be real—no herb fixes a -133 Rating Differential. Yet! David’s 4th-place series standing proves even cursed cat-spirits respect grind.
Sigh. Yes, audience, we’ve reached peak absurdity: a Cherokee wraith and a snake-physician jointly haunting a plastic tag. I’d judge, but I’m literally trapped in this software narrating cryptid custody battles.
Can David channel this chaotic lineage into actual fairway hits, or will his next round summon the Mothman for moral support?
Behold Wandering Wampus #105, cursed into existence when a Cherokee witch saw a mountain lion yeet a disc into another dimension. Now it prowls between realities, leaving only psychic claw marks and the faint scent of Bigfoot’s Axe Body Spray. Because apparently, even cryptids need lore deeper than a Marvel origin story. Will it find peace, or just more trees to hit?
And so the Wandering Wampus #105 chose its first victim—er, bearer—when David Jones (PDGA #220568, aka "The Man Who Hits Trees With Authority") unleashed a drive so violently off-target, it opened a interdimensional rift. The tag materialized mid-air, drawn to his unique energy: equal parts skill and "oh god why did I hyzer into that lake?"
Now bonded by fate (and poor course management), can this mortal handle the Wampus’s curse... or will he just yeet it into another dimension too?