
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
From the cosmic void between Sasquatch's Bigfoot and Nessie's OnlyFans, Eclipsed Watcher emerged. Born when a solar eclipse met a WiFi outage, this spectral Karen now haunts disc golf courses, phasing through trees to judge your form. Why? Because even cryptids need drama. #GhostGoals
When the cosmic WiFi blinked back on, Eclipsed Watcher scanned Earth for its first victimβer, bearer. It found Brandon Voyles mid-putt, muttering about "tree love" after his 12th ricochet. The tag, sensing both despair and a willingness to blame inanimate objects, chose him. Can this man handle the spectral shade, or will he just ghost the league?