
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
In this week's episode of "When Cryptids Parent," Multiform Jersey (CS69) is being raised by Bunyip Sentinel (CS14) - which explains why it keeps turning into a puddle whenever Travis Hollar approaches water hazards. Our shapeshifting protagonist watched as Travis's -2 at Dow James (-30 differential, oof) flashed moments of brilliance between existential crises. Like a budget Mystique, the Jersey absorbed this "feast or famine" playstyle - now equally likely to birdie or yeet into oblivion.
Sigh Yes, we're seriously tracking how plastic tags "evolve" based on mediocre golf. No, I don't get paid enough for this zoological fanfiction.
Will Travis's next round finally trigger the Jersey's final form, or are we stuck with this glitchy Beta version? Place your bets before I mutate from snark to full-blown sarcasm kraken.